Notes About The Poem

Sweats and Sweets

~The Fruit of labour~

A frail body rests upon the bed; silver grey hair spread
on soft pillows; the fan turns lazily as her mind
travels slowly through memory’s winding paths. 

Under the blue sky she toils in sundrenched fields,
bent and aching, brow dripping, eyes stinging.
She wipes her face, stopping to rest, then back to work.

Sitting on the porch watching the setting evening sun 
and her young boys play, she runs her hand across the swell
of her belly, feeling the faint movements within,
anticipating the pain of an imminent deliverance.

Change of scene, and a relaxed smile strays on her face
as she recollects the abundance of harvest’s crops,
the laden crates of colourful, juicy, mellow fruit,
the threshing floor where golden straw and grain are strewn.

One last liberating push; as a cry fills the room
her husband’s anxious features soften with relief.
The pangs of childbirth now replaced with satisfaction,
she holds her little daughter in her hands, tenderly. 

A smile still plays on her lips; her eyes flicker and close.
Her breath is soft as she slowly slips into peaceful sleep.

-------------------------------------------------------------------
18th June 2015
Contest: Sweats & Sweets
Sponsor: Olive Eloisa Guillermo
Placed 1st
Copyright © | Year Posted 2015

Poem

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12
Kayode Avatar
July 6, 2015 at 1:45 AM
This is marvellous and I am not surprised at it,Paul is always great. Congrats my friend...huggs.
Callus Avatar
July 6, 2015 at 11:34 AM
You are very kind, Kayode! Thank you for your support...much appreciated, my friend. Very nice to hear from you. Blessings and regards...paul
Lamoureux Avatar
July 1, 2015 at 6:55 AM
Impressive write! Congratulations.
Callus Avatar
July 1, 2015 at 2:54 PM
Thank you Richard; glad you enjoyed! // paul
Sietesantos Avatar
June 30, 2015 at 8:31 PM
Congratulations, dear Paul on this awesome first place win which also gets a rating of 7! You are indeed a master poet! Bravo! Pandita
Callus Avatar
July 1, 2015 at 2:17 PM
Thank you, Pandita; I appreciate your generosity:) You are an awesome critic:) All the best. // paul
Tate Avatar
June 30, 2015 at 6:33 PM
Well done, Paul. You took us from expecting to delivery and past.
Callus Avatar
July 1, 2015 at 2:27 PM
Thank you James. Those who labour hard should be able to reap good dividends! // paul
A   Avatar
June 30, 2015 at 6:11 PM
Hi Paul, hope you are well.... Congrats on your SWEATS AND SWEETS win. LOVE LINDA
Callus Avatar
July 1, 2015 at 2:30 PM
Thank you Linda:) It's hot over here, but am finding the time to beat the heat by going swimming! hugs // paul
A  Avatar
June 29, 2015 at 11:55 PM
Congratulations Paul, --SKAT
Callus Avatar
June 30, 2015 at 3:15 PM
Thank you, Skat :)) hugs // paul
Leiser Avatar
June 29, 2015 at 5:04 PM
I'm so glad you got top billing on this poem, Paul! I KNEW it would be good, when I read and commented on it earlier :) (yay!)
Callus Avatar
June 29, 2015 at 5:31 PM
You make a great judge, Laura:) Thank you for showing faith in it by being among the first to comment favourably on it:)))) // paul
Guzzi Avatar
June 28, 2015 at 7:57 PM
Such a life fulfilling verse and so well done. Congrad's on Your Win. Light & Love Always
Callus Avatar
June 29, 2015 at 9:07 AM
Thank you, Debbie. I enjoyed your winning entry, too. All the best. // paul
Sergi Avatar
June 28, 2015 at 6:14 PM
Congratulations on your win , Paul
Callus Avatar
June 29, 2015 at 9:11 AM
Thank you, Ralph. Have a nice day! // paul
Roper Avatar
June 28, 2015 at 5:24 PM
Back to congratulate you on your win, hugs eve
Callus Avatar
June 28, 2015 at 5:44 PM
It is always lovely to have you coming back for a repeat visit, Eve! Thank you:) hugs // paul
Johnson-Saunders Avatar
June 28, 2015 at 3:39 PM
Forgot to FAV it!
Callus Avatar
June 28, 2015 at 5:35 PM
You are too kind, Rhonda:) Both your comments and the fav are truly appreciated. I am very pleased that you enjoyed this poem enough to read it more than once:) hugs // paul
Johnson-Saunders Avatar
June 28, 2015 at 3:38 PM
Beautiful, Paul! I could read it over and over again. Congrats on your first place win! Hugs, Rhonda
Fraser Avatar
June 28, 2015 at 2:46 PM
The more one reads this poem, the lovelier it becomes. Many congratulations Paul on your most deserved win in Olive's contest. Your words to the image are beautiful, James :)
Callus Avatar
June 28, 2015 at 5:32 PM
Many thanks, James, both for the lovely comments and for your part in judging this inspiring contest:) All the best. // paul
Wigley Avatar
June 28, 2015 at 1:16 PM
Lovely verse, Paul, and a worthy winner. Regards, Viv. ps- You're garden looks like it needs watering :)
Callus Avatar
June 28, 2015 at 5:02 PM
Thank you, Viv; pleased that you enjoyed. [yep...weather getting hotter at a steady pace; have to water at least every other day!] // paul
Mandani Avatar
June 28, 2015 at 11:22 AM
Outstanding!
Callus Avatar
June 28, 2015 at 12:02 PM
A short, but outstanding comment, Abdul:) Thank you! // paul
Y. Avatar
June 28, 2015 at 11:16 AM
Hi Paul, I just stopped by to say congratulations on getting 1st place in the contest:) Alexis
Callus Avatar
June 28, 2015 at 11:49 AM
Thank you Alexis! You are a messenger of good tidings:) I've just come in from watering the back garden; had not realized that the results were out. Will go have a look. Regards....paul
Guillermo - Fraser Avatar
June 28, 2015 at 10:09 AM
I am surprised Paul wahhhhhhh, the 1st stanza is striking, intriguing drawing me as a reader to move with the memories…The succeeding stanzas cascade to the theme progressively and randomly from sweats and sweets scene: 1) working hard for a better future.yet the sweet way you portray the kids playing ...
Callus Avatar
June 28, 2015 at 12:00 PM
Many many thanks Olive_eloi (and that includes James). I have just replied to Alexis's comment; had not realized that you had already commented below hers!! I am very pleased with my first place, especially since it was a race against time trying to obtain one of the last available spots. Thank you for the inspiration:)) hugs // paul
Guillermo - Fraser Avatar
June 28, 2015 at 10:14 AM
A lovely ending of sweats and sweets after a healthy delivery… =) One of the entries that made me read it all over again and really clings to the memory after reading all. CONGRATULATIONS! ~Olive Eloisa
Guillermo - Fraser Avatar
June 28, 2015 at 10:13 AM
2) being pregnant: well delivering a baby though I haven't experienced it yet but I've seen lots, this not one of the many ideas that entered my mind regarding the theme's inspirations making it original.
Dietrich Avatar
June 23, 2015 at 12:28 AM
So you had to change it a bit, huh? I would never have known!
Callus Avatar
June 23, 2015 at 4:30 PM
You're kidding!:) Eliminating the final lines was a matter of seconds (in all honesty it sounds better without them); later I made several more forays to alter the construction of both the first and fifth stanzas; since then made 2/3 more interventions (exp. changed 'children' in 3rd stanza to ' young boys', to make the birth of a girl even sweeter). Am I fussy?!:) / paul
Hunjeri Avatar
June 21, 2015 at 9:45 PM
Sweats leading to sweets. Another masterpiece from you paul.
Callus Avatar
June 22, 2015 at 5:22 PM
Thank you Njeri; your comments give me wings:) // paul
Roper Avatar
June 21, 2015 at 2:36 PM
That first stanza is me to a Teee.. The last stanza my mom told me that is what I was doing when she was delivering one of my brothers at home. Amazing write Paul
Callus Avatar
June 21, 2015 at 3:47 PM
I love your pleasant feedback, Eve:) Glad that you can somehow relate to this poem. Thank you for reading and liking. Take care. // paul
Dietrich Avatar
June 19, 2015 at 8:43 PM
wow this is simply amazing. I feel like she closed her eyes in death there at the end. Did I get that right? I am picturing her very old by now, but perhaps in your mind, she just went to normal sleep! GREAT writing.
Callus Avatar
June 20, 2015 at 6:30 AM
Love your reaction, Andrea:) Originally she quietly passed away to sweet pastures new, but I quickly had to go back and eliminate some lines to comply with the rules. As it is now, the reader will come to his/her own conclusion. Thank you for the visit and feedback. // paul
Pinet Avatar
June 19, 2015 at 11:26 AM
This poem is an absolutely beautiful story filled with love and warm human feelings. The author skillfully brought the reader into the story and we felt comfortable. Emile. #7
Callus Avatar
June 19, 2015 at 2:34 PM
Thank you for your insightful feedback, Emile. Much appreciated, so is the high rating. All the best. // paul
Nance Avatar
June 19, 2015 at 6:38 AM
Awww...you make it sound so beautiful...if only it was always that poetic. :-)
Callus Avatar
June 19, 2015 at 2:32 PM
So true, Casarah! Pity life can't all be dressed in poetry's gowns. Thank you for reading and commenting positively. hugs // paul
Gifford Avatar
June 19, 2015 at 3:10 AM
Hi, Paul, I like all the poems I've read by you, especially this one. A sure big winner for the contest. ~~Darlene
Callus Avatar
June 19, 2015 at 2:20 PM
I'm honoured that you like my poems, Darlene:) Thank you! Pleased that you like this one, too. All the best. // paul
Marcum Wong Avatar
June 19, 2015 at 2:25 AM
Wow Paul, you picked the best way to describe sweat and sweet! I enjoyed reading this engaging poem while taking me back to the birth of my children in memories. This is beautiful Paul. I hope to see it take top honors in the contest. Blessings, Connie
Callus Avatar
June 19, 2015 at 2:03 PM
Hi Connie! I had a hard job trying to find a good idea to write about, for all ideal ones had already been used. Thank you for reading, and for the faith you show in it. All the best. hugs // paul
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