Sunk

I heard the words of my poem Said down the phone The same words I'd written those words down Before today and before that The same words That's the pattern Repeating The same words It's jarring on this page But it was like plunging into deep water Against my will, with no reflexes to save myself Of course I know all the next moves Pick you up, make you safe Or shout at you for lying to me I know chaos resides around you Hard to stomach, views and words Ready to engulf me as it has you I'm conscious I'm in deep water My eyes closed to prevent drowning I've sank already It doesn't matter what help is given Proof I couldn't have changed you alone I've been proving that since the day I was born So here I am with the same words I don't quite know my lines now It's hard to speak underwater