Suits and Ties

One of my boyhood dreams was to become a successful functionary,
With an office with a view, a fine oak desk and a pretty secretary!
To wear a suit and tie (to me) would be the pinnacle of success.
I was sick of wearin' brogans and overalls - I'd settle for nothin' less!

I suppose to a certain degree my youthful dreams came true.
For thirty years I wore a tie with the Air Force suit of blue.
Anon, the wearin' of a suit and tie had lost much of its appeal.
My discomfiture at wearin' a stranglin' tie became hard to conceal!

My spouse attributes my disdain for suits and ties as a lack of cultivation.
To not wear a suit and tie to church she considers an abomination!
I'll deign to wear such garb for a weddin' or funeral to be a tad more couth,
But I suffer thro' each excruciatin' minute of the ordeal to tell the truth!

Here in the wild west, a well-dressed dude wears scruffy boots and jeans.
Shucks, the feller could be a prosperous rancher and a man of means!
I'm in heavenly bliss wearin' my jeans sans a constrictin' suit and tie.
I feel as free as a golden eagle soarin' in the pristine Colorado sky!

I reckon that when I cease to function and bid my friends adieu,
That they'll insist on displayin' my mortal shell for everyone to view.
But if they dress me out in a daggone suit and especially a throttlin' tie,
There ain't no delicate way to express it - I'll just up and die!

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved
Copyright © | Year Posted 2012

Poem

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Mcallister Avatar
October 22, 2012 at 4:02 PM
skilled
Dietrich Avatar
October 13, 2012 at 2:52 PM
oh, to be born in the days of Ben Cartwright and the Ponderosa boys. I bet you'd have loved that, huh? I think many men feel as you do, bob!!
Eastman Avatar
October 12, 2012 at 6:01 PM
A wonderful write... Time changes so many ideas... I've seen mine change in so many ways, too. Very reflective poem.
Taylor Avatar
October 12, 2012 at 12:52 PM
Enjoyed, Bob. Awesome write. Nice going. Check your E-Mail. Ralphie.
Wesley Avatar
October 11, 2012 at 7:11 PM
Hee haw! This one rattles a chord deep within. Love the way you work through your disgust and still give it the humor it deserves!
Gasun Avatar
October 10, 2012 at 9:48 PM
I've enjoyed reading this awesome write of yours, Robert! I love it! Thank you so much for sharing!!! hugs:) Leonora
Williams Avatar
October 10, 2012 at 12:23 PM
Bob, nice to read your work again, you sound very happy not to be wearing your suit and tie, well done...David
Ellison Avatar
October 10, 2012 at 6:05 AM
Funny! In my lifetime, I may have worn a suit and tie maybe 28 times and even that may be stretching it a bit! Funerals, weddings and once at a Halloween dance! LOL Cheers!
Andresen Avatar
October 10, 2012 at 4:58 AM
Let us remember .... it's personality that is important - not "shell / clothes" on the outside - Thanks for writing so amusing and everyday poetry / stories, Bob. - Congratulations on your latest win poems: FIRST PRICE well deserved!! Have a lovely day with your wife. - oxox love Anne-Lise :)
Carrillo Avatar
October 9, 2012 at 8:45 PM
As you said Robert - it is funny. When I die I want to wear a beautiful night gown, since I'm going to sleep forever. I want to look good. Thanks for sharing. Lucy
Sivey Avatar
October 9, 2012 at 8:42 PM
This is hilarious my friend, extremely funny! I really enjoyed this wondrous write, each and every stroke of the suit and tie being the brunt of the joke! I don't like the suit and tie bit either Bob, I'm a jeans and polo shirt man myself...but can be bribed into a pair of dockers for some good food! What a brilliant poem of your creation, I thoroughly enjoyed it! Fantastic piece, Great Work!!
Pettit Avatar
October 9, 2012 at 8:32 PM
Another great poem Bob. You fly high again.
A   Avatar
October 9, 2012 at 8:25 PM
Dear Bob H., thank you for the smiles.. your ending was expressed perfectly.. love your poem..Good nigh..PD
Gorelick Avatar
October 9, 2012 at 8:25 PM
Excuses, excuses....wont fly, dude..Ill bet your a handsome thing in a suit...lol. BG
Ramage Avatar
October 9, 2012 at 8:10 PM
Hi Bob, my husband would agree, he just hates wearing a tie and suit and will find any excuse (too hot, not formal occasion) to get out of it. He said he gets buried in his jeans. Loved the poem! Lee
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