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June 21, 2023

 

                                                           June 21, 2023

 

 

Stinky Pete Cooper - Poop

My neighbor, Pete, is very frustrated For two weeks he has been constipated Then, in Poetry Soup I heard him yell, "Whoop Whoop!" His laxative had been activated! He eats spicy food and lot of legumes Where he shows up, a gaseous cloud looms Pete is kinda kinky When he makes a stinky He likes breathing in his odorous fumes Beth's twenty years married to Pete Cooper When he didn't flush, she said a blooper Pete left a huge floater And now I will quote her, "Pete's poops always leave me in a stupor!" One time dumbass Pete clogged up his commode After his bowels dropped a giant load Beth called in a plumber Who was even dumber He just watched as the toilet overflowed Pete's a n a l gases continue to leak Can't stand being around them cause they reek When his farts are expelled I threaten a butt weld To solder it shut, Pete is such a freak! No one sits near Pete at the town meeting No friendly smiles does he get in greeting People are of like mind Beware of his behind When his flatulence keeps on repeating Beth's face becomes twisted into a scowl She told Pete that she's throwing him the towel Next time his fecal matter Is 'neath the lid in splatter She'll not clean his crap stains again. They're foul! She won't wash skid marks from his briefs either Nor cook bean casseroles for him neither Beth's taken a firm stand Gave Pete a reprimand She's hoping that soon he'll want to leave her
Copyright © | Year Posted 2023

Poem

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Fowler Avatar
July 15, 2023 at 11:18 AM
Oh Lin - Quite the story! LOL Congratulations on your win! :)
Johnson Avatar
July 7, 2023 at 6:24 AM
Boy, you sure had fun. Love em' all.
Lane Avatar
July 7, 2023 at 6:31 AM
Oh, Leslie I really did and had to stop myself from ragging on Pete any further. LOL Thank you!
Dietrich Avatar
July 6, 2023 at 10:33 PM
Back with my congrats. All I could come up with was one limerick but I am seeing many who did story ones using several limericks
Lane Avatar
July 7, 2023 at 6:30 AM
It seems I have become a limerick addict, and I'll blame Jan and Tom. haha Thanks an awful lot, Andrea.
Flood Avatar
July 4, 2023 at 4:57 PM
Well you certainly milked this contest, Lin. And am I glad you did? Euphoric is the answer. Brilliantly constructed limericks and disgusting as disgusting can be. I thought you were a nice girl ;-) Congrats on your stinking win. Terry
Lane Avatar
July 4, 2023 at 5:14 PM
Thanks so much, Terry. I apologize for the gross lines, which would include most of them. LOL When ya write for Jan... 'nice girl' goes by the wayside.
Allison Avatar
July 4, 2023 at 3:59 PM
I'm crying laughing here lin, amazing string of limericks, you certainly went to town for the contest! Many congrats on your win:-) hugs Jan xx
Lane Avatar
July 4, 2023 at 5:12 PM
Thank you for the laughter, Jan. Once I start writing these, I can't stop.
Faulkner Avatar
June 22, 2023 at 8:44 PM
Wow, Lin, your proficiency for poop poems is poetically potent :) I think Jan will love these, best wishes for the contest!
Lane Avatar
June 22, 2023 at 11:39 PM
I’m not exactly sure what that says about me, but I took one for Jan with all of these. Lol. Thanks a lot, Michelle. Your alliteration is also proficient!
Koplin Avatar
June 22, 2023 at 1:36 PM
HA Ha. I'd like to say I'm not guilty of anything in the picture you posted, but I'll take the 5th. You wrote a bunch of great limericks that Jan will love!
Lane Avatar
June 22, 2023 at 11:38 PM
Don’t incriminate yourself, Mark. Thanks for liking them.
Dietrich Avatar
June 22, 2023 at 12:35 PM
wow, you outdid yourself with this topic, Lin. Also I enjoyed the part you put at the top. You have great humor. I don't think I could stand being around Pete!
Lane Avatar
June 22, 2023 at 11:37 PM
I couldn’t seem to stop the ideas. I hope it’s not too many! Thanks, Andrea.
Kitchin Avatar
June 21, 2023 at 4:53 PM
Ha ha, very funny, I enjoyed your chain of limericks, Lin.
Lane Avatar
June 22, 2023 at 8:53 AM
Hi Tania, and thank you very much. Forgive my 'grossness.'
Kavanagh  Avatar
June 21, 2023 at 6:41 AM
8 limericks of poop Lin, and any one of them individually would place very high in the contest, but together I think they will rise all the way to the top, and overflow into a big steaming pile of glory, Jan will be so delighted, cheers David
Lane Avatar
June 21, 2023 at 10:39 AM
Hi David. My mind overflowed with ideas for Jan’s theme. Lol at your “steaming pile of poop, I mean glory.” This site needs more humor and less negativity from some who dwell in the muck. Thanks so much for leaving me your thoughts.
Edmonds  Avatar
June 21, 2023 at 5:42 AM
I guess Pete won’t want to leave Beth, perhaps he’ll buy her a peg, and a blindfold for when washing the bowl, who else would want to share the marriage bed… Belle (love the Lims)
Lane Avatar
June 21, 2023 at 5:45 AM
lol Thanks, Belle. I think Pete would be wise to build another bathroom!
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