Spinning Daydreams

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I ambled in shadowed life, secluded in shrouded night, afraid to be seen by day, fearing glowering looks in light. I searched for a refuge where none could do me harm, and a fire in winter to beget my cold heart to grow warm. No cacophony of a running brook would bring relief. I heard no harp strings in symphony to ease my grief. No one did I find to soothe or salve my restless pain, no willing hand reached out to help me stand again. I was a dreamer, spinning daydreams I never found. No twin for my soul; no loved one to whom I was bound. I couldn't hear my weeping, which I loathed so much. My wants and needs were the same - just a gentle touch. My sorrowful eyes cast downward so no one would see the empty portals left behind of the woman I used to be. Destined to always be alone, I gave up on love and hope. With clouded visions in my eyes, no longer could I cope. Bundled in rags, I realized how inhuman I had become. In fetal pose I gave up, to malevolence I did succumb. Unworthy, I closed my eyes to sleep, but first to pray, "God, show me mercy and not give me another day." I felt a hand on my cheek; and fingers brush my lips. His warmth was fire, radiated from his gentle fingertips. I blossomed as a flower, but couldn't give joyous scream, guided by the hands of one I'd only imagined in a dream. My eyes could not envision and my ears had never heard but my heart embraced what I could not express with word. My rescuer took my hands and dried the tears from my eyes. There was no more remorse. I no longer donned sad disguise. No more spinning daydreams of what life could hold for me. Gone are the days and nights of all the, "If I could only see." Sight does not open doors or windows to wisdom's call. For the chance I've been given; well, now I think I have it all. I've the gift of hope, with the knowledge that someone cares. No more whining over how I used to think life was just not fair. I walked out of the deep shadows where I used to live and hide, into a world where I am loved, with an angel always at my side.

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Eileen Manassian

Date: 4/22/2016 9:55:00 AM

Dear Lin...this message is full of truth and hope...for many. Sharing makes us vulnerable, but it can be a source of blessing to others. Thank you for posting this heartfelt write. We are often disappointed by people. He knows what is best though at times, it is hard to accept. Thank you so much for your recent kind remarks on my poem. Bless you.

Lin Lane
Date: 4/22/2016 11:28:00 AM

Humans are imperfect creatures who have been given free will to do bad or good. Unfortunately, it's the selfish ones who use that will to do harm. We get hurt, we get back up, and do it by God's grace. Thank you for liking this one and you're welcome for my words on yours.

Walter T. Ashe

Date: 4/21/2016 9:26:00 PM

Wow!.....everything about this is deeply felt and the last two lines illuminate! Torture would have been not remembering these thoughts! :-) This is beautiful Lin!...from first to last line!

Lin Lane
Date: 4/22/2016 6:45:00 AM

Yours is the only comment, but in your sincerity, this one is more than enough for me, Walter. I much prefer honesty over fluff. Thank you for reading it and appreciating what I was attempting to deliver, and so I appreciate You.