Sorceress

What could I possibly wish to say... too much, too much but never a perfect way to word it Perfect...I curse the word yet like a dart it's quick to part my lips to prick the target of my desires What do I desire to finally sketch a page of me without hitting backspace to erase the fragmented sequence of someone so distracted What distracts me so questionable second place being my unfortunate place Was there really proof in the cliche 'Nice guys finish last' a ridiculed B-Team while others wish for a replica B-Team I guess I'm the captain They say never to judge a book by the cover but so it seems most have forgotten how to read so I am a book left untouched grabbing dust upon a broken shelf And I could spew a thousand names to bear my shame And I could spew a thousand names in which to point the blame And I could spew a thousand names in swift repetition of countless entries documented in weary journals ...sorry to disappoint myself all over again How did I become not enough Flaws, yes I am I am but minor compared to a tornado still I am major compared to a song How have I become not enough an invisible bottle of liquid only drank upon an edge of depression How have I dared to be not enough.. Was it her, her welcome back invitation Well was it her, her that said so sweetly deceiving Was it her How...Why...Why come forward back all these years to welcome, reawaken love laid dormant under a boiling volcano of dastardly hatred Why come forward back years later with open arms to whisper soundly 'You will never be enough' a silent curse under a camouflage of confusion Sorceress, why must you always manipulate cupid to slay me indefinitely Why must you always persuade cupid to slay me indefinitely... What's a gift someone please favor me and put a definition to action and present it to me so I can learn For all I have known are curses See, my hands bear the blood of my own attempting to rip the flesh off my skin cause I despise my face, despise my taste but I black out and wake up from a nightmare to see my face in the mirror confirming the nightmare I awoke from a was only a mental asylum to prevent me from crying unsteadily in the nightmare I'm awake in Devour me, ocean please Devour me, ocean please I have a fear of drowning... but drown I may and drown I might for cupid has slain me tonight 'Doth hath argue too much' Why would I dare speak if I'll never be enough