Suicide Is a Permanent Fix

The light shines on the knife like a spotlight When I hold it I hear it screaming at me to end the fight This life isn't something that's worth trying for This pain feels amazing while I bleed on the floor Tears like rain On the ground in all this pain Fighting for my life while I crawl towards the phone I keep on bleeding my whole life has been blown I tried so hard to carry this world on my back But I guess I was tired of living in a world of black If I could go back I know I wouldn't do it again I'd just do one cut, maybe two but suicide is a sin Oh wait...there's a dim light in the distance Is it god? I don't know...but I'm not innocent Maybe he realized the purpose I had Maybe he'll give me a second chance to not be bad Wait...no it was the light of the porch My mom just walked in through the door I can hear her screaming, crying reaching for the phone The one I couldn't get to before my chance was blown I'm using all my strength to call out her name But I can't say anything I'm just playing the possum game I slowly move my head just to give her a sign A sign that I haven't yet died Now there it is the siren coming closer Thank you god for not letting me leave her I am all she has, there's no one else in her life The sirens just came and now they're a dying light Why did I do this I'm thinking how she feels The one she loved and trusted did this at my heart it reels I'm so sorry I say when I wake up "Why did you do this, did I push you to give up?" I look into her face, she feels that no one cares After I did this she think no one will be there But I can't blame her I'm sorry oh god she's thinking how she lost him Now I know suicide is a permanent fix for a temporary problem