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Silly Sally's Summer Sale

Silly Sally sells books, this week there's a sale -
               New titles each Friday; I go without fail.
          This book took the do-it-yourselfers by storm:
               "How To File Your Own Taxes" by May Linda Form.

          If this one's available, I'm calling dibs:
               "Let's Cook in the Backyard " by Barbie Q. Dribs.
          If that one is sold out, this might fit the bill:
               "The Perfect Hamburger" by Patty O'Grill.

          If you don't have time for the whole book, just scan it:
               "Naming Your Newspaper" by Dale E. Planet.
          This one's selling out, be the first on your block:
               "You Must Bring My Daughter Home" by Ada Clock.

          One book I've been wanting I think really rocks:
               It's called "Spooner's Footwear". It's by Susan Shocks.
          You students may need this one for your next quiz:
               "It's All About Nature" by Ollie G. Whiz.

          And speaking of science, this one is debateable:
               "Decomposing Organisms" by O. deGradable.
          If you know a student, I'm sure they will love:
               "Better Test Taking" by Olive D. Above.

          At 70 cents, this old book is a cheapie:
               "Hypnosis Tricks" by U. R. Barry Sleepy.
          For those with a more Catholic upbringing:
               "Be On Time For Church" by Isabel Ringing.

          Need help thinking quicker? This one's on the button:
               "Reacting in Crises" by Olive O'Sudden.
          You could take this one on your longer vacations:
               "Destroyer Warfare" by Mandy Battlestations.

          To order this title, you may have to beg:
               "My Very Small Breakfast" by I. Ada Negg.
          I know of a fitness book you ought to buy:
               "I'm Living Forever" by Dawn Wanda Dye.

          This could be a best-seller, I have no doubt:
               "It's None of Your Business, You Twit!" by Bud Out.
          You may think these books are for real. If you do,
               there's a nice bridge in Brooklyn I'd like to sell you!

Copyright © John Watt | Year Posted 2020

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Rercy Zola-Zaba Date: 7/23/2020 3:17:00 AM I see you have a witty side John, a fun piece of work ,I enjoyed it very much. Regards. Login to Reply John Watt Date: 7/23/2020 7:53:00 PM Thanks Rercy!

Michelle Faulkner Date: 7/13/2020 8:13:00 PM How did I miss this? To explain - when I was in junior high (many moons ago!) I wrote a short story called 'Silly Sally' (it was about a puppy that got into a LOT of trouble) so this brings back fond memories - and your titles are so creative and fun - I don't think I could come up with any if I tried :) Login to Reply John Watt Date: 7/14/2020 12:22:00 AM To be honest, I've been 'collecting' these book titles for many years; I keep them in a file. Some I thought up, some I heard, but I always write them down. Recently, the thought occurred to me that I should put them into a poem. Do you still have a copy of your story from Jr. High? John Watt Date: 7/13/2020 8:18:00 PM I'll admit this brand of humor is an acquired taste, like cricket, or pork rinds. Glad you enjoyed it and found a common bond we share in Silly Sally writes! Thanks, My friend.

Caren Krutsinger Date: 7/10/2020 4:07:00 PM This is a hoot! Your imagination is on fire! Just be careful to not take it too close to all of these perishable books! Login to Reply John Watt Date: 7/10/2020 5:39:00 PM LOL! I'll try to remember to bring a fire extinguisher with me next time I visit a book store! Thanks for the fun, Caren.

Gershon Wolf Date: 7/9/2020 10:43:00 PM This is a howl, John. How did you come up with all these names?!! Love it!! Thanks, gw. (Soup mail, please) Login to Reply John Watt Date: 7/10/2020 1:19:00 AM Thanks for the comment (and soup mail), my friend!

Andrea Dietrich Date: 7/9/2020 8:27:00 PM hahaha, great ending on this very clever poem, my friend. Is this one meant for Brian?? I see Jo said it best. You did a QUIRKY one! Login to Reply John Watt Date: 7/9/2020 9:10:00 PM Yes, I submitted this one to Brian against my better judgment and he honored me with a 1st! I guess he was feeling in a quirky mood that day, haha! Glad you liked the ending, I tacked it on at the last minute.

Joanna Daniel Date: 7/9/2020 5:09:00 AM What an extremely humorous and excellent write, John, loved all your quirky titles with their strange authors, very creative:) it must have been difficult to write.. Login to Reply John Watt Date: 7/9/2020 12:08:00 PM I am grateful for your generous comment, Jo. Glad I could bring a smile. Take care, my friend ~ John

Gary Radice Date: 7/8/2020 4:39:00 PM Very clever John adding a spoonerism in there as well. Loved it :) Hopefully this poem will find it's way into The Magnificent Poetry Book by Wanda Full. :) Login to Reply John Watt Date: 7/8/2020 5:27:00 PM Ha ha! Loved your comment and glad you spot my coonerism, oops, I mean "caught my spoonerism"! Does Wanda Full collaborate with Marv O'Liss? Thanks, Gary ~ John

Ilene Bauer Date: 7/8/2020 2:48:00 PM john - i hope you had as much fun writing this as i had reading it (and i'm sure you did!). you have outdone yourself in this poem - absolutely delightful! Login to Reply John Watt Date: 7/9/2020 9:46:00 AM I had a blast writing this, ilene. I imagine you having some fun writing your daily treasures as well! Thanks for the lovely visit, my friend ~ John

Sam Kauffman Date: 7/8/2020 12:13:00 PM Picking daisies in the outfield, I see. So fun! A fav for me. Congratulations on your first place! Seems like this must have been written by Mid. E. Knight. Thanks for the smiles and giggles my friend! Like Paula, I love books especially those written P.O. Ems! Login to Reply John Watt Date: 7/8/2020 1:07:00 PM Smiles upon smiles, my friend. I left one out because the rhythm wasn't quite right, but I thought you might like it: "The First Christmas" by Harold Angels and Mary Rhoda Nass. Thanks for the read and fun comment. I had a feeling you would be a book lover. ~ John

Paula Goldsmith Date: 7/8/2020 10:22:00 AM Congratulations on your win. So cute and fun. I love old books and old book stores. A wonderful picture to go with your wonderful write. Enjoy your win and day......... Login to Reply John Watt Date: 7/8/2020 11:37:00 AM Thank you for the read and lovely thoughts, Paula. I'm afraid my bookshelves have become so full I've had to stop buying old books unless I unload some, which is so hard to do! Take care ~ John

Kenneth Cheney Date: 7/8/2020 8:12:00 AM Extremely creative and quite humorous. John this an interesting and clever piece. Really enjoyed it. Login to Reply John Watt Date: 7/8/2020 11:35:00 AM Glad you enjoyed it, Kenneth. Appreciate you stopping by ~ John

Brenda Chiri Date: 7/8/2020 7:52:00 AM John congrats on your top win!;) Login to Reply John Watt Date: 7/8/2020 11:35:00 AM Thanks for the visit, Brenda. Congrats to you as well ~ John

John Gondolf Date: 7/8/2020 7:27:00 AM This is so clever, John, I love it. A great fun way to start the day. Well done my friend. John Login to Reply John Watt Date: 7/8/2020 11:34:00 AM Alway grateful for your kind words, fellow poet. Take care ~ John

Aditi Mishra Date: 7/8/2020 6:55:00 AM Such a fun and witty journey through the book sale John! The referred titles are brilliant. Congratulations on your win my friend. Loved reading this humorous muse. Blessings :) Login to Reply John Watt Date: 7/8/2020 11:34:00 AM Thanks for finding this witty, my friend! Blessings ~ John

Tom Cunningham Date: 7/8/2020 3:42:00 AM Haha brilliant John, love the humour. Now about that bridge lol Good luck in the contest Tom Login to Reply John Watt Date: 7/8/2020 11:33:00 AM Thanks, Tom. Buy now, there's only one left!