Shadowed By Doubt

I believe in love, but it's shadowed by doubt. Doubt from my experience along the way. Something that I thought I would never find out. But things don't always work out, do they? Maybe I turned away or I didn't want to see, what was really happening to us There were red flags waving right in front of me. Did I think there were no issues to discuss? For better or for worse is what I thought I had. But life pulled a fast one on me. There was much more "for worse", and that was sad, I didn't realize how much worse it could be. You could say that he made it easy for me. To decide what I needed to do. To not only look but really see, that he was doing what you hoped would never be done to you. It would have been nice to be able to say, "Alas, parting is such sweet sorrow" But that scene, I could never replay. And I had to focus my sight on tomorrow. It was hard to watch it play out to the bitter end. It became more hostile as time went by. When all was finished, there was not one friend, who had stayed for support, or at the least, try. I felt that I had barely made it out alive. And shortly thereafter I wasn't really sure, If I did or I didn't in reality survive? And if I had was it worth all this and more? Time has passed, I feel so much older now. The pain, betrayal, and sadness of it all, has left my life, suspended, not sure how. I hope to find love and support, before I fall.