Santa Scrooge

(an oldie "light" sonnet)

The Santa that I know is not so nice.
If there's a gift I tell him that I'd like,
he only will complain about the price,
and when December comes, he goes on strike!

For Santa is no sweet and jolly gent.
For instance, when it's time to do the tree,
he hates to have to bring it from the basement;
I trim it then without the grumble-bee.

It hurts my back to put up outside lights,
But I don't bother my "dear" Claus for that.
And so our house stands naked through the nights
of Christmas time ‘cause Santa is a rat!

My Santa Baby's great at subterfuge.
So ho, ho, ho for me.  I married Scrooge!
Copyright © | Year Posted 2010

Poem

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12
Watt Avatar
August 16, 2020 at 10:09 PM
Another fun one I remember from Cheshire Chuckles. You wrote a lot of fun Christmas poems back in the day! Love the rhyme of Scrooge with subterfuge.
Guzzi Avatar
December 11, 2010 at 9:47 AM
I hear ya. My ex was never thrilled about Christmas either, maybe they should hold a HUMBUG! Convention over the 25th & we could get them tickets? Light & Love
Brown Avatar
December 9, 2010 at 10:31 AM
It is the season to give thanks...I wish to thank you for your support and friendship this past year (2010) Andrea. May you and yours have a wonderful Holiday Season and may the New Year (2011) bring you and yours good health, and may your hearts be overflowing with love and happiness. Love and blessings always, Carol
Sweetheart Avatar
December 7, 2010 at 12:35 PM
hahaha.. oh Andrea..how creative.. and am sure your luv is NOT this bad..but an excellent holiday take on the other side of Santa luv.. enjoyed and still smiling my friend..
La France Avatar
December 7, 2010 at 8:01 AM
Humm.. that miserable Scrooge, he needs those 3 spirits to visit him, hire someone to put up the outside lights!! that should get him going~ enjoyed your poem~ it is great how you can have humour over something that I think has much truth~~
Radke Avatar
December 6, 2010 at 9:31 PM
Oh this was very fun to read. I love the ending. Thank you for this one.
Melody Lightning Ink Avatar
December 6, 2010 at 5:17 AM
great lines again. well done and am wishing you the best in all you do in Jesus name amen. love, lightening ink.
Crisci Avatar
December 6, 2010 at 2:15 AM
Thanks for sharing your Sonnet, Andrea. I thought that Santa was really nice! Ha! Ha! Ha! You have invented Santa Scrooge...I think I like this one better! :)...you've made me laugh hard! I wish you the best. Peace and Love, Andrew.
Cwiak Avatar
December 5, 2010 at 8:51 PM
I know what my wife would say to this, Andrea..."Humbug!!" She married the only Scrooge, unless we are brothers and don't know it. LOL Enjoyed this much! Dan C
Robbins Aka Gonzo Avatar
December 5, 2010 at 2:52 PM
Really warm andfun write my friend good to be reading your wok oncwe agian stay crazy Gonzo
Fraser Avatar
December 5, 2010 at 2:45 PM
hehe, funny one Andrea. I had a good chuckle at this one >> James :)
Peranteau Avatar
December 5, 2010 at 2:17 PM
LOL !!!!! This is just funny ! great write Andrea !...."Foetere": stinking smell. much love, james
Fillmore Avatar
December 5, 2010 at 1:39 PM
This is great Andrea:) so sad you married Scrooge:(
Bloomsfield Avatar
December 5, 2010 at 11:40 AM
re comment on my senryu 'In high streets' its an empty hand begs. .the empty hand of the poor. .it could be and empty hand begs. (bags)could be that way too . . :)
Guzzi Avatar
December 5, 2010 at 9:40 AM
Home now, jet lagged 600+ emails! No worries all is well achhoooo!
Babcock Avatar
December 5, 2010 at 9:17 AM
I think this sounds typical of our household. I ask Santa to bring in the tree or put up the lights and only when I start will he come out and try and help. I know about the grumbling of doing things and spending money on gifts Yippes sounds like my house. I definitely married a scrooge. ha ha ha I work retail part time in a kitchen store and last night our first Sat. night opening bombed as it was pretty dead. Glad it was as the day was extremely busy. Love Phyl
Austin Avatar
December 5, 2010 at 7:58 AM
Sounds so typical. Putting on license plates and trying to get Christmas lights to work were just a couple of my pet gripes. Good work, Andrea. Love, Dave
Kendrick Avatar
December 5, 2010 at 4:28 AM
Some men just are not cut out for all that..They are couch potatoes or chair potatoes or something..Great topic that you have chosen..I am glad that I chose this one to read today..I am glad that you enjoyed my work about my facing the airplane and surviving to tell the story another day...Sara
Bloomsfield Avatar
December 5, 2010 at 2:02 AM
Hilariously funny. ..I can't stop laughing. .'Santa Scrooge',there must be plenty of them :) tmfvs
M V Avatar
December 5, 2010 at 1:28 AM
An exceptional presentation of Santa!Beautiful sonnet,Andrea
K. Avatar
December 4, 2010 at 11:33 PM
oh shucks! An impostor Santa! and wow I think you are just so cool to pull off a sonnet like this one, Andrea! Well I am not surprised-- you are sonnet lady!! ^_^ really enjoyed reading this -- and thank you for the 5th place win ^_^ super happy you liked that winking star ;D -- hugs to you -- nikko :) & yupp-- hah aI said I'd be quick-- geez I'm like over 30 mins here now-- aaack
Devonshire Avatar
December 4, 2010 at 10:03 PM
Not sure if I answered your question earlier, Andrea, but Dr. Ram says he wants a poem about "a wreath that hangs on a door." Love, Carolyn
Devonshire Avatar
December 4, 2010 at 9:53 PM
Got a great laugh from this one, Andrea. Take it easy on Santa, okay? Otherwise you'll have to haul the tree up from the basement. lol Love, Carolyn
Falotico Avatar
December 4, 2010 at 5:36 PM
Love this write so much. Made me smile a lot . And yes my dear poet you are right on the mark with my write. Thanks so much for 2nd place. You made my night and weekend. Thank you love Michael
A  Avatar
December 4, 2010 at 5:06 PM
Smiles Andrea, .~Have yourself a great evening*luv~SKAT
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