Not For Sale -- To You

A good friend of ours was approached by a very uninformed buyer for a mint condition 1958 Corvette he'd put up for sale. It didn't go well - “So, why are you selling your '58 Vette", the interested party inquired, then added, “I'm sure - as pristine as it is - it’s gotta be tough to let go?" Then quickly went on - before I could answer - by stating, “You’re asking a lot… so before I can make you a serious offer, there’re certain things I need to know. Like: “Hopefully the wing-windows haven't been lost, 'cause they would be tough to replace. And seeing the inside door handles are gone…how do you open the door? It says in your ad it's a manual transmission, but some of your pictures are blurred, And I need to know if it’s a - four – on-the-tree --- or a five, or a six - on the floor. “Where is the passenger side glove box? And why is the mirror on the dash? Is it an overhead cam or an under? Are the torsion bars liquid or gas? Does the dual-point carburetor function OK? Are the pistons hydraulic or solid?” Realizing he knew virtually nothing about cars…I thought about kicking his ***, But -- fighting as hard as I could stay calm -- I turned to the butt-head and said, “Like it says on the plate, it’s a four on the floor, it’s “factory”, and everything works! Nothing is wrong…and nothing is missing….the chrome and the paint are superb… But classics like this one should never be sold to one of those - dim-witted jerks - “That knows almost nothing about classic cars! It wouldn’t be right for some fool To wind up the owner of something this rare and as perfect as Corvettes can get... So…given the questions you’ve asked, I’ve decided…not even at triple the price… Will I sell a guy who’s as clueless as you are -- our fabulous ’58 Vette!” PS: I've now got 4 new Audio-CDs - @ 4 1/2 hours each = (62 diversely varied pieces). They’re listed on EBAY - under - “Mark Stellinga Poetry” - or available by simply contacting me at -- mark@writerofbooks.com -- should those of you who enjoy listening to poems as well as reading them - and particularly those of you that travel - care to be so entertained. (We use safe and simple - PayPal) Cheers, Mark