Not For Children

NOT FOR CHILDREN

       It had been in the window for a week,
A bedroom display    with
Santa    in the sack    asleep,
His bright red clothes draped over the bedpost,
A half-empty fifth of whisky on the night stand

Adults looked on in horror
Especially the old folk
A drunken Santa    passed out in bed?
That was no damn joke!

From time to time    with onlookers
Santa  -  clad in white, trap door underwear -    
        would rise,  
Sit his broad    bare    behind
On the edge of the bed,
Lift the fifth    and take a swig

Oh how they gasped    the church crowd
When Santa lifted, let out gas    quite loud

 Christmas Eve the shocking scenes were passed,
A breathing time come    at last
The bed was empty    
Santa gone    clothes gone
Whisky bottle sanding empty    BUT!

Gawking folk    now looking skyward    beheld
A sleigh    eight reindeer   
And the jolly old elf cracking whip, belching
        good cheer

Rudolf still led the horned team in flight
But watchers beheld a stranger sight
Bold  -  lit up like a big red rose – 
       And thrusting a Star reaching beacon, 
       Santa’s whisky sodden nose
Copyright © | Year Posted 2013

Poem

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Suzadail Jr. Avatar
February 14, 2014 at 2:30 PM
If I had to wear a red suit and deliver toys in a sack in some neighborhoods in the middle of the night, I'd be downing that whiskey pretty good.
Marcum Wong Avatar
December 28, 2013 at 5:29 PM
I adored the humor in this creative piece Daver. He does have to fly pretty high (no pun intended) and it gets cold up there. Haha. I hope your Christmas was wonderful!
Guzzi Avatar
December 26, 2013 at 3:57 PM
Poor Santa so many with gas, drunk & bad, no new good adventures Happy Boxing Day! Light & Love
Collins Avatar
December 24, 2013 at 12:12 PM
This is the best Claus poem I've ever read. Glad those adults finally saw the sleigh. Merry whatever it's called, love, Kathy
A   Avatar
December 24, 2013 at 1:51 AM
Daver, , Guess what? , The end of the year is approaching :) and there's no way I'm letting this year end, without dropping by with SMILES and CHRISTMAS CHEERS. Thank You for making this a great year for ALL OF US. --- May magic fill your days and all your dreams come true this holiday season. MERRY CHRISTAMS <3 Love Linda -The Sweetest Poet Destroyer
Mac Donald Avatar
December 23, 2013 at 3:01 PM
Strange Santa in your neck of the woods, Daver.:) "Santa’s whisky sodden nose", poor Rudolf should have headed back to the North pole, I don't think Mrs. Claus would find this amusing. She might feel to smack him with a candy cane. Thanks for sharing...gave me mucho smiles. Merry Christmas to you all! Love, Mikki
Gorelick Avatar
December 21, 2013 at 5:54 PM
Do you suppose Rudalph got his nose from sneaking a swig or two? Cute poem Dave-r. BG
Dietrich Avatar
December 21, 2013 at 9:14 AM
hahaha, Look up in the air, it's superman, no it's the red nosed Santa Claus!! I LIKES this jolly one for Xmas.
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