Monster Or Marvel

Before the beginning of time, so we existed. Without a beginning or end, I tell this tale. The Commission of the Light Empire revoked my standing as Conjurer. Stripped me my bags of dust. In their ignorance they had ruled against me on my relationship with a Bearer of Life. Those Forms had underestimated me. They would feel my wrath. I submerged myself in the pit of boiling ids. Sacrificed my borrowed guise. Inhaled the woman I love, swore not to exhale. Then placed my hands in the flow of the rushing Blood Falls. So I willed it. So it was done. The Commission no longer existed. No other Form, or speck of life existed. Once again it was I and the void. My bags of dust in my possession, my lover and I would etch out our Eternity as one. With life in her womb, we would celebrate, perhaps conjure a new world. A world with Forms created in my image.
Sponsor: Debbie Guzzi Contest Name: Monsters and Marvels 09~10~2014
Copyright © | Year Posted 2014

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Mehta Avatar
October 15, 2014 at 12:31 AM
Nicely composed poem, Maurice, congrats on the win
Meier-Hans Avatar
October 14, 2014 at 10:38 PM
Ok I'll just say dido what everyone else said. Congratulations on your HM Maurice. I love you but I can't pretend to know why the #@# you're talking about and I am tired so I 'll try again tomorrow my friend.
Meier-Hans Avatar
October 15, 2014 at 2:36 PM
Ok thanks Maurice.
Yvonne Avatar
October 14, 2014 at 10:50 PM
Just read Daver's comment. He has it dead on. It is not every bodies cup of tea. Sometimes you put it out there and wait for the smoke to clear to see what you have. You may have noticed this was very low on the list. I see it as a pity HM. I'm not proud I'll take it.
Yvonne Avatar
October 14, 2014 at 10:45 PM
It's a Bear.
Allison Avatar
October 14, 2014 at 12:23 PM
Extremely deep and very creative Maurice:-) many congrats on your HM:-) hugs Jan xxx
Yvonne Avatar
October 14, 2014 at 10:56 PM
Honestly, this one will never see the light of day again. The contest said Monster, Marvel. I wrote something. I would of changed it, I just didn't have anything. It happens.
Austin Avatar
October 12, 2014 at 10:15 AM
A different sort of Eden, daring and imaginative. God or devil, eh? Thanks for reading my stuff. Love, daver
Yvonne Avatar
October 14, 2014 at 10:57 PM
God Bless You Daver, yes that is exactly it.
Vh Avatar
October 11, 2014 at 11:33 AM
"I submerged myself in the pit of boiling ids..." Lovely!
Yvonne Avatar
October 14, 2014 at 10:59 PM
Jessica at least you found one line, bright and intuitive you are.
Dietrich Avatar
October 10, 2014 at 11:15 PM
I read it again and for me the impact was the same. It seems to have more commas in it now. Is that what you were talking about?
Yvonne Avatar
October 14, 2014 at 11:07 PM
Yes. I threw in capital letters, punctuation, added words to create full sentences, deleted extraneous text and ended up with the same crap I started with. There are good days and there are bad days and I am going to leave it at that.
Guillermo - Fraser Avatar
October 10, 2014 at 9:05 PM
:o deep intriguing write..! :) this can be drewn.. :D the images are beautiful
Yvonne Avatar
October 14, 2014 at 11:10 PM
There is nothing wrong with this poem that a small bomb wouldn't solve
Trifiatis Avatar
October 10, 2014 at 3:04 AM
Metaphysical, esoteric, free will, determinism, soul mates, revenge and finally becoming God all in one poem. This my friend Maurice, is very hard for somebody to do in such a limited space yet you did very well.
Trifiatis Avatar
October 15, 2014 at 12:17 AM
Yes, I have got that with God's grace plus it is my domain, mon ami: Philosophy!
Yvonne Avatar
October 14, 2014 at 11:15 PM
Yes, you understood it well. You must have a sixth sense, it was not easy for others to even understand. Thank You.
Deschler Avatar
October 10, 2014 at 1:10 AM
Sometimes, a monster can do more good than bad. It just depends on how people perceive his actions.... I enjoyed your take on the theme. A very intriguing write, Maurice! Good luck in Debbie's contest!
Yvonne Avatar
October 14, 2014 at 11:21 PM
Thank you Kelly. The only other copy of this poem was on my IPad that I ran over several times with my truck. I then used a sledge hammer on it several times. Threw it off a high rise building. Incenarated it and brought it to the lake tied it to a boulder and threw it in.
Dietrich Avatar
October 9, 2014 at 10:18 PM
wow, this one is very deep, Maurice. I am not exactly sure if I get it. But in a vague way, I think I do. It is a bit existential? I think you would make an awesome monster marvel!!!
Yvonne Avatar
October 14, 2014 at 11:23 PM
Gpod news they have a search warrant out for my brain now.
Nance Avatar
October 9, 2014 at 10:06 PM
What a great story, sounds like it is ready to put to a graphic novel
Yvonne Avatar
October 14, 2014 at 11:26 PM
Now there's an idea. Graphic novels are like butter to me. I love them. Have you ever read anything by Alan Moore or frank Miller or Neil Gaiman?
Lindley Avatar
October 9, 2014 at 9:23 PM
This is creativity at its max my friend!!! Bravooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!
Yvonne Avatar
October 14, 2014 at 11:30 PM
Thank you for your very genourous comment.
Mcdaid Avatar
October 9, 2014 at 6:58 PM
smiling did you see my monster i have in the same slot now maurice i tip my hat to you pal really enjoyed reading pal
Yvonne Avatar
October 14, 2014 at 11:33 PM
If I haven't seen yours I will make sure that I do.
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