Rama Balasubramanian Poet Free verse

Moment I End My Thoughts

Every time I erase all thoughts from mind,
moment I stop thinking,
world comes to an end.
Along with it my body, my pain, everything. 

This makes me think, does the world exist or 
is it a mere figment of imagination?
Is it a dream?
It seems I will wake up to find it is all gone 
Vanished into nothingness
Am I creating so much hue and cry over a non-existent entity?

When world ends in mind, I still exist
I am aware of its end.
I cannot see myself
but am there 
as an awareness of an invisible entity. 

I am convinced I am not this body.
I want to see myself now. 
My attachments break. 
I experience calm 
but a restlessness to see self occupies mind.

I am convinced both soul and God exist.
I feel if I can continue being without thoughts for long time
I will see my soul. 

I try again and again
but fail to remain without thoughts.
Wish it were easier

08.10.2021
Premier contest winner 7th position

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Beata Agustin August 12, 2021 at 10:13 PM Wow! Congrats! I am with you in this belief: "I am convinced both soul and God exist." May I add, what matters most is our personal relationship with the Lord which we can share with others. God bless you. Thanks for your uplifting comments.

Krish Radhakrishna August 12, 2021 at 1:00 PM Very nice Rama! congrats on a well deserved win! It is not easy to keep the mind blank!!:)

Greg Gaul August 11, 2021 at 1:34 PM You dive so deftly into the true abyss of duality to reveal your awakened awareness. This poem is an object lesson into mindfulness. So well done. Congratulations on your placement.

Paula Goldsmith August 11, 2021 at 10:12 AM Congratulations on your win. A Wonderful Write. Love your line, "but fail to remain without thoughts." Guess we always have thoughts going on. Enjoy your day and win with blessings.............

Sam Kauffman August 11, 2021 at 9:58 AM Such wonderful ponderings Rama. There is a pensive depth that sets the mood for this poem of your lifelong journey! Love thelast line! Congratulations on your win!

Christuraj Alex August 11, 2021 at 5:11 AM Again, Congratulations! It was well predicted. Thank you again for suggesting to change my title.

Unseeking Seeker August 11, 2021 at 5:04 AM Beautiful thoughts on no-thoughts, Rama! Congrats on your win!

Christuraj Alex August 10, 2021 at 10:35 AM Thoughtlessness is almost an impossibility. Beautiful writing. - When world ends in mind, I still exist - Well-Said.