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Home » Poems » Jan Allison » Midwife Crisis

Midwife Crisis

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07/12/25

I’m summoned to a baby shower The mum to be’s flustered and dour As her waters just broke In front of shocked folk Her baby arrived in an hour I cleaned up mum and baby Ted And lifted Ted above my head No diaper, I'm cursed He piddles, - nowt's worst No wonder my face turned bright red

Copyright © | Year Posted 2025


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Beaufort Avatar
Duke Beaufort
Date: 7/16/2025 2:17:00 PM
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Jan, you make the most of each sticky situation! It certainly does happen. What's really funny is that history repeats. What happens when we get old? Watch out below!!!! OMG and smiles!
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Joseph May
Date: 7/15/2025 5:00:00 PM
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Lol, a shower in more ways than one
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Anne Winter
Date: 7/15/2025 8:04:00 AM
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Ha. This is adorable and funny in a cute and sweet way. The title hits different after reading the poem and made me laugh even more. Thank you for the laugh :)
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Karen Jones
Date: 7/14/2025 4:53:00 PM
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Cute one Jan!
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David Kavanagh
Date: 7/14/2025 1:25:00 PM
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Fountain of youth indeed Jan lol, so cute, anyone who’s held a new baby in their hands will relate to these (little accidents), I agree with Lin, it could’ve been a lot worse or messier, great set of Lims, cheers David
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James Peranteau
Date: 7/14/2025 11:36:00 AM
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the welcoming read dear poet ') ty...much love
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Jan Allison
Date: 7/14/2025 11:41:00 AM
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thanks James:-) hugs jan xx
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Valsa George
Date: 7/14/2025 2:34:00 AM
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You never fail to amuse us, dear Jan. However, you needed a shower as you cleaned them up. The baby only made it more urgent! :)
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Jan Allison
Date: 7/14/2025 11:41:00 AM
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I try and make folk smile with my silly poems Valsa:-) hugs Jan xx
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Mystic Rose Rose
Date: 7/13/2025 3:12:00 AM
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you keep us laughing even when there is nothing funny to laugh about in our lives. Thanks for this Jan, never lose the spirit of jovial banter, :)
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Jan Allison
Date: 7/13/2025 3:27:00 AM
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Thanks Vie, life is tough at times but I try and lighten the mood with a silly poem from time to time hugs jan xx
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Ilene Bauer
Date: 7/12/2025 4:07:00 PM
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ha! thanks for the laugh, jan! perfect title, too!
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Jan Allison
Date: 7/12/2025 4:58:00 PM
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I'm so pleased you like the title Eileen, your comment made my day:-) hugs Jan xx
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Andrea Dietrich
Date: 7/12/2025 12:59:00 PM
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Ha. I hate when they piddle on you. My son did it to me once.
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Jan Allison
Date: 7/12/2025 4:57:00 PM
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they do have a habit of piddling when a nappy is off lol:-) hugs Jan xx
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Lin Lane
Date: 7/12/2025 12:41:00 PM
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Coulda been worse, Jan if it’d come out from another anatomical place.
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Jan Allison
Date: 7/12/2025 4:57:00 PM
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i may work on a turd verse Lin lol:-) hugs Jan xx
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Tom Cunningham
Date: 7/12/2025 11:45:00 AM
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Now I know the meaning of baby shower lol. Tom
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Jan Allison
Date: 7/12/2025 4:55:00 PM
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lol thanks Tom:-) hugs Jan xx
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Lin Lane
Date: 7/12/2025 12:40:00 PM
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Lol Tom. Not quite.
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Jack Horne
Date: 7/12/2025 11:34:00 AM
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LOL, thanks for a much needed chuckle - I'm going cross-eyed after catching up on comments
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Jan Allison
Date: 7/12/2025 4:56:00 PM
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its so lovely to see you dear jack, real life comes first, soup takes a backseat when time allows:-) hugs Jan xx
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Kim Rodrigues
Date: 7/12/2025 10:56:00 AM
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Quite the entrance into the world!
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Jan Allison
Date: 7/12/2025 10:59:00 AM
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Thankfully its pure fiction lol, just wanted to inject some much needed humour into the site:-) hugs Jan xx

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