Melancholy Memory

As for me, I didn’t really care. My heart was somewhere else. My mind wasn’t focusing on the scene in front of me. I was falling deeper and deeper into the subconscious void that co-exists with my conscious yet totally un-existing to any tangible thought to ever exist while I still remember it. In this void there are many details still unknown to me; all I know is that there I am happy, safe, secluded. Happy; a feeling I seldom feel. Most of the time I’m lost in the pessimistic views of my shadowed self. The nostalgic feelings of my childhood are kept safely in a metaphorical box in which I only know the password. Or do I? I may have known it at one time but now its lost along with all the happy memories I keep locked up; now covered in a blanket of sorrowful memories. It’s mentally impossible for me to remember a time without the remembrance of the past four years surfacing and taking over all thoughts that even contain happiness. Yet there is a light. Something that breaks through what is unknown to most and most frequently resides in me. Feelings which dance with the darkness and stir inside me every time I see you. It takes me over and gives me a newfound sense of happiness that I never thought I would be able to enjoy again. Love flourishes in the bonds we have made with each other and grow like sweet-smelling flowers in the springtime. My love for you will not break.