Mad About Towns

When we set out on a road trip We didn’t stick to the old script And were gladly amazed And rarely unfazed Hitting strange towns though some were skipped We started from Thatsnot, OK Which was more or less ok But then stayed for the view When we drove into The town of Overlo, OK I had a painful relapse From too hard to reach earwax We got through Crac, KS But stopped in Snac, KS For some aspirin, drinks and snacks We saw Lo, CO and Bo, CO And then stopped for a cup of Joe At a café in Sco, NE And lastly in Pho, NE To buy a phone since ours was too slow Then we pulled over for a dish Of the most fabulous fish In a town called Tro, UT Or was it in Cooko, UT Nevertheless it was delish We quickly saw Rap, ID Felt embraced in Stup, ID Loved the friendly And the trendy Ideal town of Envy, NV We skipped to Wawa, WA But skipped Akack, AK For that was too far And could not get the car To tropical Low, HI, no way Next up on the map was E, OR Where sadly our stubborn four door Had much tire trouble From the sharp rubble On the rough roads of Fourdo, OR We passed Alpacas eating hay Near the road, past Alpa, CA And drove through their mess In the city of, guess You’re right, the town of Ca, CA I would never recommend Spending a long weekend In Lazy, AZ Nor Crazy, AZ Which was just around the bend Next we made it to Crowb, AR And had drinks in the Pry Bar But the best town by far Along that stretch of tar Was the aptly named Byf, AR We then made it to Oohla, LA Were we spent lots of moolah Then we saw a bear cross Though it looked quite lost Near the wild town of Koa, LA We were famished in Ha, MS So we shopped for yummy yams Plus some cheese and ham And of course good jam To go with seafood in Cla, MS We loved driving through these states I mean what else in life relates And the funny town names Out did trivial games As this story well illustrates But once we reached Can, AL We slid right into a canal And then we were towed By a truck with a load Of gators from Anim, AL We stayed at the Grand Hotel In the town of Ohwell, FL Though it cost a large sum We got to watch some Football in nearby En, FL My wife made a big to-do When she got a small boo-boo In Googooga, GA Right next to Yo, GA From slipping on pigeon doo doo And we would never have seen If not from all of the peeing Hard to find Isee, NC Unlike that Usee, SC Where we drank too much caffeine As stargazers we had to stop Against a beautiful backdrop In Superno, VA Despite snobs from Di, VA Who tried to hog that fine hill top We then met well-dressed Wendy Up the road in Emdee, MD She seemed a specialist And high-fashion stylist Who was elegantly trendy She said up north of DC You’ve got to shop in Sue, DE For cute leather goodies And deals on chic hoodies Plus good pie in Alamo, DE We made sure to stay in our car And avoided most of the bars In the burg Thor, NY Just up from Hor, NY Chock full of sleazy two stars We heard there was a Perfe, CT But we couldn’t find that city Nor was it a town Though the busiest around Was aptly called Defe, CT Then we were totally surprised On our journey when we realized There’s a town Safa, RI Next to Calama, RI Which satisfied as advertised It was oddly kind of a shame Seeing a non-New England name Titled Alaba, MA Unlike old Grand, MA Which for towns, was the grand dame We loved the plainness of Sa, ME Renowned for its permanency Yet I found an excuse To seek out some moose With our journey to Excuse, ME We went as far north and east Or as far as I could at least Although we felt blessed We had to head west And that need to head west increased We first drove to old Grand, PA To visit my long lost Pappa Then stopped in Pap, PA Where I was in awe Beside the grave of my grandpa Next we journeyed to Ohio And got off track in Uh, OH That got us annoyed And we couldn’t avoid Stepping foot in rural Poohpo, OH On the highway we went straight down And pulled into a smelly town That’s called Stin, KY Next to small Din, KY Which was as tiny as it sounds Going back north we then ate At a Spanish joint in that state In the town Spa, IN Stayed the night in Ma, IN Right off Main at the Super 8 Was it the thought of pastrami Not too far away in Why, Wi To drive through Ma, MI Blow off Sala, MI All on an empty tummy We then headed back southward Got stuck in a traffic herd In of course Sna, IL Had drinks in Cockta, IL At some dive called The Blue Blurred As we got closer to our condo We had to first see a show In the ***** town of Ho, MO Catch some great deals in Pro, MO But frankly were real low on dough We then met up with Silvia In the town of Lyd, IA Who got a disease From more than a squeeze When she stayed in Chlamyd, IA We dropped off hitchhiker Brock Who was suffering from shell shock In nearby Pt, SD Or was it El, SD But we made him walk the last block We almost got in one last jam Within the river town of Da, MN As the bridge was down We’d be stuck in town Except we did cross the new dam The last state’s towns are trendy Like Frie, ND and Tre, ND And though we felt fried We’re glad that our ride Ended in good old E, ND!