Lightweight Champions

I sometimes just think to myself about all the things I should be, The things I could be but.. What's going to end up being me? I'm not sure. I'm never sure. My anxieties eat me alive but I brush them off me like they're temporary problems or lightweight champions. I think of my life.. And how its going to be, I wish and wish for better days And every wrong decision I make, I lose hope. But hopefully when I'm hoping, My hope grows and it shows. I just want what I can't have and need what I don't need. I want to be successful and love everything I do. but how? How can I... Its the question I keep stumbling upon. Lately I've been just.. faking who I am. Keeping everything in. I can't express what I am or who I am without being judged so what's the point? Atleast I can dream. About my fantasy that might be more than closer to reality than I think.