Just Holding On

Just holding on I’ve been spinning around; I’m so lost in this town. Still trying to find perfection; Looking for direction. I need a guiding hand to push me like you mean it! I want you to help me, to tell me exactly what I need to be! Still searching, still searching; why can I not have love? I am forever failing in my endless searching, For that thing that everybody else does. Fading in and out of life as today’s people just pass me by on their way, Without a ‘Howdy do’; I never hear a word that they say. Words of wisdom mean nothing to an amoeba who cannot hear. All your helpful secrets you keep inside, while pushing me so far away. When all I need is for you to pull me near, I see you successfully running your life into the ground And leaving me to my own pain. I cannot speak about thoughts that I can never let myself speak out. I keep my tongue in a lock-box when all I want to do is shout! All of this it eats away at all of my love, but never my pain. I feel the same old sting of insecurity every single day. So scared of falling to pieces; no faith left in my brain. All I keep inside just leaves me to cry. The agony of being me! This loser, freak, shall forever be nobody. Holding on by only fingertips; Just holding on to shattered reality pieces. Holding on by fingertips… One day soon I will surely slip. (C)2017 Aa Harvey. All Rights Reserved.