Jacob's Ladder

JACOB’S LADDER News is out; Armageddon is upon us, and it is time for all of us to go The world's armies have all gathered, and they are putting on a show Heaven is calling and, everyone wants to know just where they stand Before packing up their worthy goods; and, off to the Promised Land After centuries of rejection; all want show, their claim, of being a Jew Even a whole bunch of Aborigines; who just nobody, even had a clue They took every boat, plane, train, bus, car or, pushbike to get there Even the Muslims rushed so much; they did not, even stop for prayer Palestine was the hot spot; whilst looking for some bloke called Jesus Some found a guy called Moses; and, they thought that was a bonus Every ladder found propped up; was then looked upon, in special awe But; God was just having a moment "cause he knew the bloody score God had divided us all over across world, north, south, east and west Each and every one of us was exiled out and then sent on a holy test Now each and every one of us back again here at his holiness request As lined up to see which one of us; was now gonna be flamin' blessed The Jew boys’ butts; were flapping, they just would, not give it a rest First in line as Gods chosen children; they forever continued to stress The rest of us just stood about with D.N.A forms and monies in hand Whilst an angel stood at each rung of the Jacobs ladder theirs to man Inspecting each and every one of us; to see, if we can make the grade Bribery, of course, was acceptable if enough to each angel can be paid Compassion was even allowed here; as we all stopped for a cup of tea Thus the angels could offload their booty; and, have themselves a pee Rungs unmanned, a few got in; that should not have been there at all As Saddam Hussein’s nephew got in; with a phew that was a tight call The blind and lame on the sidelines thought they didn’t have a chance But; the Angels just stopped the rest of us; and, let them all advance It took twelve days in all; for the Gawd maddening crowd, to die down Until all that was left was a boy called Sue, and that Clooney the clown Jacob’s ladder was then carefully hoisted up and was never again seen No one left except the charlady; who was still cleaning, up the canteen O’ that other bloke who started all of this; goes by the name of Jacob He left not long after we arrived; to have, a few rashers, of illicit bacon So if there was ever a earth in heaven; we were about to have our day It was so crammed packed up there; even Jesus had, nowhere to stay The queue at immigration was as worse than if we’d been back at home The ledgers were so overworked at the mouth, they as started to foam The Jew boys were all busy; and, had already set up their vendor stalls The rest of us were just stuck in no man's land, with not, a soul to call Just as on earth when the dosh ran out, we were then shown the door Gawd; I really would not have bothered, if I had really known, the score But hey; the free-fall back down to earth was nothing short of amazing Time; I got home every bone in my broken body was well & truly aching Armageddon wasn’t so bad given it was only Israel that they blew apart As I'm now off shopping down at the now, unmanned, local super-mart Indiana Shaw . . .