If Only You Knew

If only you knew you make me feel like a monster, a horrifying beast that must be carefully tip-toed around. If only you knew you make me feel like a wild animal, one that attacks the vulnerable and crushes happiness. Your looks of distaste for my very being find a haven in the small crevices of my mind, never leaving. Your words laced with a bitter, invisible poison crawl through the holes my insecurities leave. I fear that I slowly am beginning to believe your accusations, that I truly am the twisted, unhinged lunatic you proclaim me to be. Belittling my protests of injustice, you control me. I still give everything to you: my love, my sense of worth, my time. But you never acknowledge me. If I ever shared how you truly make me feel, would they even believe me? So I don't. I choose to whither away, the small child inside of me crying for help, for comfort. It never comes.