I Want to Know What It Feels Like To Be a Normal Teenager

To go out with friends Without having a care in the world To find people who just get me And accept me the way I am To be good at a sport And to be known To do well in school Yet not be “too nerdy” To be pretty Without being accused of Seeking attention To popular But not obnoxious To be in love Without falling into the trap Of he loves me, He loves me not, And wondering everyday If I am worthy of your love Without worrying everyday If today will be the day You find someone else and leave I want to be a normal teenager Because soon It will be this time That I grieve Instead I crawl out of bed everyday Wondering if I am good enough For any of this Pretty enough to go Out with friends and to Not have a care in The world- And just be myself Social enough To be accepted By a group of people The way I am Fast enough For my name to be Known in my sport No- Just to be Average at my sport To be smart enough To do well in school And even have a future To be cool enough For people to want To be around me To be beautiful Without having to Put pounds of Makeup Everyday Making-up A false reality Of the person I Would die To morph into Just to be good enough For someone to love me Without them wanting to leave. Even though I am living As a teen, My teenage experience Is something I grieve.