I Am Imperfect

I am imperfect I think that it’s impossible to be anything but, and yet I long to be humanity’s one spectacular exception I wish that my subconscious would listen to reason… it tells me I am deceptive I feel that I am living a double life I dream of and dread the day that people truly see me I wish they were aware of the ocean of sins I carry I am conflicted I believe that if I’m perceived, they will be disgusted, worse, disappointed I dream of finally bellowing out this polluted river in my lungs Of being held and comforted in my filth without a second’s hesitation Yet I know that I am lovable I know my loved ones would do exactly what I’ve been dreaming I know, deep down, that what I’m truly afraid of Is seeing myself in all of my depravity, and knowing that I’m undeserving I am imperfect