I Had a Little Nut Tree

I HAD A LITTLE NUT TREE I had a little-nut tree Nothing would it bear But a silver nutmeg And a golden pear. The King of Spain’s daughter Came to list me: She'd heard about my little-nuts And simply wanted to see. Her list was entitled “little-nuts guys” And there were guys she’d missed. Asked her if it was a crazy-guy survey Or an anatomical-query list. She said, my young man I’ve never seen such a little-nuts display for free: I’ll put you at the top of the crop, You and your little-nut tree. Well, I love to win contests And be in a top position; Nothing gives me more pleasure, Far beyond the competition. But I’d rather be on her crazy-list and be kissed Just like Jack Nicholson, Than on her anatomical-list And studied by a freak-physician. …………………………………………………………. NOTE My apologies to all lovers of the original, traditional nursery rhyme.