Homophone Me

There once was a robin who flew
somewhat strangely down my chimney flue.
When I asked if she missed
due to morn's heavy mist,
she said, "That, plus I'm fighting the flu".

Unhappy with how much I weigh,
for a long time I searched for a way
to get rid of some weight.
This was well worth the wait:
to fruit smoothies I add powdered whey!

She prays to her Father most holy,
while adoring His worthiness wholly.
For long hours she'll kneel
by her new husband, Neil.
So that's why both their pants are so holey.

Though he couldn't look me in the eye,
the cupcake thief said, "It is I".
When I asked, "So you ate
every one of the eight?"
With a fierce stomach ache he said, "aye".

A new singer has come to the fore
though I honestly don't know what for.
Her light dimly has shone
(as her critics have shown) -
her "cringe" songs I could name three or four.

This poet tells bad jokes (puns, too)
every minute he'll tell one or two.
Now this half-funny bard
from all bars is now barred
till his victims who passed out come to.

My sailboat I towed down the road
to the bay; at the helm my son rode.
But no breezes were seen 
at the smooth-as-glass scene -
to our destination we both rowed!

Twelve donuts I opted to buy,
as I nibbled on them by and by.
Now they're gone - who knows where
(my new pants I can't wear)
With this mystery I'll sign off. Bye!

//Homophones - two words sounding the same but with different meanings //

Written 26 Oct 2022

Copyright © | Year Posted 2022



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Date: 11/19/2022 1:01:00 PM
This contest was just "purr-fect" for the cool cat of puns and double entendres dear friend! You did an outstanding job. This is so worthy of a win! Congrats and high fives! Hope you are having a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday week and that your Thanksgiving Day is one of joy and blessings poetry Bro! A samba from Samba!
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Date: 11/15/2022 9:07:00 PM
These are beyond amazing, John, should have placed higher, congratulations:)
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Date: 11/15/2022 8:12:00 AM
This is top notch, John. Limerick vignettes with homophones in each. Wow, you have aced this one with humor and skill. Congratulations on your fine piece of poetry.
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Date: 11/14/2022 8:44:00 AM
Good morning. Left a message on this last night and see it isn't here. :'( I love the poem. Congratulations on your win.
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Date: 11/14/2022 5:14:00 AM
Wow! Congrats! Thanks for sharing this, making me chuckle at the scenes you poetically created. God bless you.
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Date: 11/14/2022 12:58:00 AM
Great use of homophones (in threes!) and very funny limericks, too; congratulations
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Date: 11/13/2022 2:07:00 PM
So much enjoyed this John, very creative and had some good chuckles, thanks for your entry!!
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Date: 11/7/2022 3:22:00 PM
Best wishes, Joum. There’s are superlative! Pangie
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Date: 11/7/2022 3:12:00 PM
Crikey, sets of three, no less. I looked at that contest a few times, noted loads of homophones and wrote precisely zero lines. Passed on the contest in abject defeat. So well done, John. Best of luck in the contest. Terry
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Date: 11/4/2022 7:32:00 AM
hope this one ever gets judged!
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John Watt
Date: 11/5/2022 10:32:00 PM
Tomorrow's the deadline... should be soon
Date: 11/2/2022 7:51:00 AM
Very clever limerick’s and Homophones John, a humorous read. Best wishes for the contest… Belle
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John Watt
Date: 11/5/2022 10:30:00 PM
Thank you for making the journey with me, Belle. Always appreciate your kind words ~ John
Date: 11/1/2022 5:28:00 AM
This is very clever artful write, not easy for most but you have nailed it John and all in Limerick form, so well penned John dear friend and i have also seen quite a number of your poems right at the top you are doing famously and so sure this will be on the winners list - my fave is your last stanza so i'll also sign off 'Bye' Hugs and blessings, Jennifer.
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John Watt
Date: 11/5/2022 10:29:00 PM
You are always a wonderful encourager, my friend. And you are so good with humor and wit in poetry, so your comment means even more. Thank you for the lovely comment. Hope you are feeling 100%. H & B ~ John
Date: 10/30/2022 10:38:00 AM
that was pretty cool how you did separate topics by limerick form. Way to do the challenge, and congrats in recent marathons. I am doing miserably
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John Watt
Date: 11/3/2022 4:17:00 PM
Thank you, Andrea. After you left this comment, I saw you got a podium win in the latest marathon mile. Happy to see you doing well again.
Date: 10/30/2022 6:01:00 AM
What a wordsmith extraordinaire you are Mr. Watt. Superb! I note your poem 'Portrait' has reached the top of the tree too so.. take a bough. :) Cheers - Gary
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John Watt
Date: 11/3/2022 4:11:00 PM
Thank you , my friend. Love your punny wit, Gary. I will leaf it at that ~ John
Date: 10/27/2022 9:13:00 PM
Simply marvelous craftsmanship with this form and strictures. ;o)
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John Watt
Date: 11/3/2022 4:16:00 PM
Thank you, Arlo for your very generous assessment. I enjoy taking my serious hat off once in a while.
Date: 10/27/2022 4:17:00 PM
Wow, John, I am so impressed that you have so many clever and funny ones, and in limerick form too! It's hard to pick a favorite, but the flew/flue/flu from the first made me smile, and the tale of the cupcake thief is one I may or may not have first hand experience :) This should nab you a place on the winner's list or I'll eat all eight cupcakes!
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John Watt
Date: 11/3/2022 4:15:00 PM
Thanks, Michelle! After I found a triple homonym I thought it would be fun to do a limerick, then I couldn't hit the breaks. Oops, I mean brakes. Nice to know I won't have to eat all the cupcakes myself. ;^) ~ John
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