Hashtagmetoo- Yes, Me Too

hashtagmetoo- yes me too I see it in nightmares- paralyzed with fear did I do something wrong? will anyone believe me? I knew something was very wrong inside me cause I was just a little girl- a little girl still playing with dolls he was a family member about 30 beloved by all the first time was at grandma's cottage he invited me to go out in the rowboat to the island in the middle of the lake we got half way and I felt strange he was staring at me in an odd way when we got to the island I refused to get out and would not look at him I just said I want to go back okay baby whatever you say the next time it was christmas day everyone was having fun I went to my room for a breather and suddenly he was there I backed up till I was at the wall I was just a little girl a little girl still playing with dolls he closed the door and unzipped his pants and took out his thingy and walked towards me pressing himself against my body your so beautiful in a minute he was finished and had ruined my new christmas dress he whispered into my hair don't tell anyone I was numb felt so ashamed he had stolen my innocence I never told the last time- was in the spring of the new year I was reading in the backyard my parents out I saw him coming and I jumped up like a gazelle being chased by a lion running into the house I locked all the doors I curled up in a ball on the kitchen floor . . . that's where my parents found me and within their arms I told them all of it I heard my mom on the phone she's just a little girl still playing with dolls nothing was really done no criminal charges I kept this secret for years from everyone else the monster took what he did to his grave and I as a young woman I had to let it go I said to me I will get back my heart I will find my way back from the darkness and I did . . . I had planned to spit on him at his funeral but didn't though when people thought I was kneeling to pray by his coffin (not praying) I was whispering I hope you rot in HADES . . . that was years ago Now- there is the hashtagmetoo movement and women and men and kids are speaking up about sexual assault I am all for this . . . not alone beloved actors news people politicians directors famous people even the president priests bosses in the workplace even beloved family members there seems no limit it is endless and I support them because metoo metoo I was just a little girl still playing with dolls ___________________________ November 30, 2017 Poetry/Free Verse/Hashtagmetoo- yes, me too Copyright Protected, ID 17-9675-20-0 All Rights Reserved. Written Under Pseudonym. Written for the contest, Hashtagmetoo sponsor, Debbie Guzzi Second Place