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GRIM REAPER CAN WAIT

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“Amazing tradition. They throw a great party for you on the one day they know you can’t come.“ Quote by Jeff Goldblum. JOHNNY SPICER In this tomb are the bits and pieces of the butcher Johnny Spicer Got distracted whilst cutting meat and fell into the meat slicer. JAMES.D.BOWLER In this crypt are the flat remains of James.D.Bowlar Tripped crossing the road into the path of a steam roller. FREDDIE ALBRIGHT In this grave is the head of surfer Freddie Albright It was all that was left when he encountered a great white. JIM BYRONS Buried below are just the bones of hunter Jim Byrons His rifle jammed and his body eaten by lions. THE COMEDIAN Hear lies Sid the comedian who thought it was funny Kicking the bucket and owing the taxman money. WILLO THE WISP Lying below are the charcoaled remains of fire eater Willo The Wisp Who drank too much petrol in his act and was burned to a crisp. EMILY GRAF Interred in two pieces is the magician's wife Emily Graf Something went drastically wrong, and he sawed her in half. PETE THE BUILDER Above this grave is just the statue of the builder Pete Fell headfirst into a cement mixer whilst mixing concrete. JOE McNAIR The loud crackling you can hear in this grave is of the killer Joe McNair Too much power was used when they executed him in the electric chair. Written on 11th August 2024.

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Michael Tor

Date: 12/4/2024 9:48:00 PM

Tom loved all your characters and their sad deaths. How clever the deaths were you had me laughing. I am glad I am reading the Poetry I did not read from you. I am finding treasures. This one is a favorite. I am a little late in reading but it is still a favorite. Thanks for writing really enjoyed to read. God bless my friend...

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/5/2024 12:09:00 AM

Thank you very much Michael, death will come knocking for us all, I'm just laughing in deaths face, well for now anyway, thanks for the fave, I'm happy you enjoyed them. Tom

Linda Alice Fowler

Date: 9/17/2024 6:59:00 AM

Giggled through this one Tom. Thanks! :)

Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/17/2024 7:33:00 AM

Thank you Linda, although the grim reaper might have the last laugh when he comes knocking my door lol. Tom

Panagiota Romios

Date: 9/9/2024 8:06:00 PM

Hilaririosly done, Tom, and being a Goldblum fan, loves the quote you chose.thanks, for making me smile! ~ Pangie~

Panagiota Romios
Date: 9/9/2024 9:54:00 PM

Thanks Tom. Pangie

Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/9/2024 9:50:00 PM

Thank you very much Pangie, It was Spike Milligan's epitaph on his headstone I told you was ill that inspired me, glad you enjoyed them. Tom

Duke Beaufort

Date: 9/2/2024 8:18:00 PM

Tom, you have such a great sense of humor with all of this. I was reading these to a friend of mine and we were both laughing and laughing. Smiles, sir!

Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/2/2024 11:34:00 PM

Thank you very much Duke, I'm glad they gave you a laugh, I know he'll come knocking my door one day lol. Tom

Alesia Leach

Date: 8/31/2024 8:35:00 AM

Totally enjoyed. These are so humorous, but what terrible ways to die. I loved to picture too.

Tom Cunningham
Date: 8/31/2024 8:39:00 AM

Thank you very much Aleisa, glad you enjoyed the dark humour. I won't be laughing when the Grim Reaper comes knocking lol. Tom

Suzanne Delaney

Date: 8/30/2024 9:48:00 AM

These epitaphs are so humorous and clever, Tom: I was chuckling the whole time. Your sense of humour is a real gift and I am so glad you share it with us all. Hope you are well. SuZ

Tom Cunningham
Date: 8/30/2024 10:06:00 AM

Thank you very much Suz, the grim reaper will come knocking for me one day, I'm just trying to have a laugh at his expense whilst I'm still kicking lol. I'm happy that you enjoyed them. Tom

Sara Kendrick

Date: 8/22/2024 2:30:00 AM

Creative use of personalities, occupations, recreational activities, and people. LOL.. Sad that they died, but humorous in their manner of death. Thank you for compiling these and sharing them with us. Sara K

Tom Cunningham
Date: 8/22/2024 3:55:00 AM

Thank you very much Sara, I'm hoping when my time comes it will be peaceful lol. Tom

Valsa George

Date: 8/21/2024 8:48:00 AM

Tom, you are so very funny.... ! Had a good laugh. Unfortunately all of them met with unexpected accidents. I feel so sorry for Johnny Spicer. To have fallen into a meat slicer... how terrible it would be !

Tom Cunningham
Date: 8/21/2024 9:21:00 AM

Thank you very much Valsa, I'm happy you enjoyed the humour. Hopefully mine will be peaceful. Tom

Joe Maverick

Date: 8/17/2024 10:53:00 PM

My thought is..????? May he be in a taxi with it On the meter..?? No it won't work..!! Not the Meter' they always do.!! Dang it..Err what to do?? I know?? I do??well I hope' put up a notice that satan thinks he's God.? And supply details of His whereabouts church?? Etc.. I mean I'm Only human here... I have invited Jesus so that Allays all fear.'

Tom Cunningham
Date: 8/19/2024 12:59:00 PM

There's no need to fear death if we follow his teachings, death is just the next stage of our existence. Hope you're keeping well Joe. Tom

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 8/16/2024 1:02:00 AM

Hahaha. I think this has to be the funniest stuff you ever wrote. A fave

Joe Maverick
Date: 8/29/2024 10:45:00 PM

What.??? Do my eyes deceive me?? ( in best frank spencer ) Style...And to think?? The loong Loooonng minutes! I have spent In replies!! and antic-dotes...well Yes dotes it seems is the right Word..?Yet no more.!!! I feel like My funny bone has been ripped Out and i'm not joking.!! No more doting its good night from Me..!!Yet I doubt not him? Lol)))) Btw i'm not sure if i'm joking or Not somebody help!!

Tom Cunningham
Date: 8/16/2024 1:12:00 AM

Thank you very much Andrea, I'm happy you enjoyed the humour, we've all got to go so let's just laugh in the reapers face lol. Thanks too for faving it, have a great weekend. Tom

Linda Alice Fowler

Date: 8/14/2024 11:12:00 AM

Funny Tom. I love the Goldblum quote. I hope your week is going well. :)

Tom Cunningham
Date: 8/14/2024 12:15:00 PM

Thank you Linda, I might have my wake before I go I'd hate to miss out on a good party lol. Tom

Paula Goldsmith

Date: 8/13/2024 10:41:00 AM

WOW!!! I enjoyed reading your very creative write. What a great picture you have here. Love your humor. I think, I want to go another way. To see angels is for me... Have a blessed day writing away.............

Tom Cunningham
Date: 8/13/2024 11:23:00 AM

Thank you very much Paula, lol me too, when I go I too want to go peacefully. Hope your day is going well. Tom

Regina Elliott

Date: 8/13/2024 10:30:00 AM

A very creative take on how some people meet the Grim Reaper. Excellent penning, Tom. Have a grand Tuesday. All the best. ~

Tom Cunningham
Date: 8/13/2024 10:34:00 AM

Thank you very much Regina, I'm happy you enjoyed it. Hope you too have a lovely day. Tom

Daniel Henry Rodgers

Date: 8/13/2024 6:41:00 AM

Woah, Tom, I loved this twist that brings on the bizarre nature of death. Should I be fearful! LOL! I loved how you showed each of these circumstances and the twisted nature of fate. - Blessings, My Dear Friend, Daniel

Tom Cunningham
Date: 8/13/2024 6:47:00 AM

Thank you very much Daniel, glad you enjoyed them, I hope when my comes it's peaceful lol. Hope your week is going well. Tom

Victor Buhagiar

Date: 8/13/2024 3:41:00 AM

Great wit, Tom. Loved them. Not at my best these days. C'est la vie!

Tom Cunningham
Date: 8/13/2024 4:10:00 AM

I'm sorry to hear that Victor, I hope you are feeling better soon. Tom

Beryl Edmonds

Date: 8/13/2024 1:30:00 AM

Great epitaphs Tom, what fun… Beryl

Tom Cunningham
Date: 8/13/2024 2:59:00 AM

Thank you very much Beryl, I'm pleased that you enjoyed the humour. Hope you're enjoying the warm spell. Tom

Eileen Manassian

Date: 8/12/2024 8:27:00 PM

Oh me oh my... these were so good. How very clever of you. Don't think I can come to with anything half as clever. Thanks for the chuckles.

Tom Cunningham
Date: 8/12/2024 8:58:00 PM

Thank you very much Eileen, I'm happy you enjoyed the humour. Hope your week is off to a good start. Tom

Gary Radice

Date: 8/12/2024 12:00:00 AM

What with all the bad news going on in the world I needed this Tom. Thank you. I'm laughing here over my cornflakes. Going off at a slight tangent, I'm reminded of what it actually does say on Spike Milligan's grave stone: "I told you I was ill" :) Cheers - Gary

Tom Cunningham
Date: 8/12/2024 12:10:00 AM

Thank you very much Gary, lol, I remember that one, he was one hell of a character. I'm slowing getting back to writing, since my op last November I've been in travelling a lot, going for it while health allows. I hope you are keeping well. Tom

Gershon Wolf

Date: 8/11/2024 8:17:00 PM

Emily Graf and Pete the Builder have me howling, Tom! So good to see you limericking it again! Keep 'em coming! Thanks, Gershon

Gershon Wolf
Date: 8/14/2024 6:33:00 PM

But I AM a pianist, Joe! ~ Peon Issimo

Joe Maverick
Date: 8/12/2024 8:42:00 AM

Oh my Tom..You have made G W a pianist.!! I love it.) nothing Like a little mirth..Shakes your Girth.' And in real like captn James Cook...Boiled in the polynesian islands and eaten Whats in your name is sometimes enacted ( by such Noble savages in detractive ) it could still Happen in the Amazon.' Anon..I shall prithee now depart to Study more on life and art.!

Tom Cunningham
Date: 8/11/2024 10:56:00 PM

Thank you Gershwin, I was reading famous last words of people that had passed and it inspired me. Glad you enjoyed them. Tom

Tania Kitchin

Date: 8/11/2024 4:23:00 PM

Tom, a great collection of epitaphs, clever and funny.

Tom Cunningham
Date: 8/11/2024 10:51:00 PM

Thank you Tania, I’m happy that you enjoyed them. Tom

Terry Flood

Date: 8/11/2024 3:40:00 PM

Brilliant, Tom. Must have a go at this sometime ;-)

Tom Cunningham
Date: 8/11/2024 10:50:00 PM

Thanks Terry, you should, they are quite addictive once you start. The reaper will come for us all one day so just laugh in his face. Tom

Lin Lane

Date: 8/11/2024 3:28:00 AM

These are great, Tom. I like reading the ones outside of Disney’s Haunted Mansion. Here’s one I just wrote… Resting below are the remains of Tilly McBride. Struck by lightning and died while being fried.

Lin Lane
Date: 8/11/2024 5:57:00 AM

aw, Tom. Thanks for your thought. That Winchester is still with me. May have to use it on a couple of really mean hombres who call me and my poetry sisters 'mean girls.'

Tom Cunningham
Date: 8/11/2024 5:16:00 AM

As long as your packing that Winchester, I'd follow you to hell and back lol.

Lin Lane
Date: 8/11/2024 4:22:00 AM

Following me to the dark side could get you in trouble, Tom. Lol. Loved your rhyming epitaphs!

Tom Cunningham
Date: 8/11/2024 4:15:00 AM

Thank you Lin, yes I've seen them too, I remember Milt wrote some a while back. I think it was your dark verse that got me thinking about death lol. PS. Love yours too. Tom

David Kavanagh

Date: 8/11/2024 3:18:00 AM

Some great gallows humour here Tom, not easy to put so many of these hilarious epitaphs together, might as well enjoy them while we’re still alive lol! Pete the builder is my favourite, Cheers David

Tom Cunningham
Date: 8/11/2024 3:27:00 AM

Not sure where they came from but Lin wrote a Poe like verse yesterday and I think that's where the dark humour came in. Might as well poke fun at death because none of us get out alive lol. Tom