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Flood Warning Collaboration - Inspired By Contest

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I crossed my legs but there was a flood Blushing red I hope folks understood But my waters had burst And the baby's my first Guess I'm ready to start motherhood! NOT FOR CONTEST WRITTEN on 27TH August 2016 BY JAN ALLISON My babe arrived as hungry as a horse As a good mother, I fed him, of course When my breasts began to fill Another flood was about to spill Until my child suckled with great force. WRITTEN ON 08/27/16 BY LIN LANE The first twelve months went mighty quick Time flying by lickity split Crawls out of bed Sits on mom's head A young fireman squirting his stick WRITTEN 08/27/16 BY TIM SMITH Hay, thought I heard another sound of thunder roar Eeh gad, seems to be another two babies more They all have lots of hair Mother-in-law beware Now I am having triplets let me out the door. WRITTEN 08/27/16 BY EVE T M C He was born without a suntan And didn’t favor the milk man Birthed on a polar bear rug Full beard on his tiny mug Holding a harpoon like Tarzan! WRITTEN BY SONNY ROPER 8/27/2016 Oh my! What will people think? My baby doesn’t favor his dad’s wink I can always claim in shame He favors my grandma’s frame On my mother’s side is large and pink WRITTEN BY EVE ROPER 8/27/2016 One baby after another I sure am a busy mother I cross my knees Whenever I sneeze Out one end or the other! WRITTEN BY CASARAH NANCE It’s all my darn uterus’s fault, Can’t bring my crying to a halt, No more sex with my hubby, I’m just too tired and chubby, This babe’s an exhausting result! Ice came out sucking a pacifier, Posted sign, “Eskimo nanny for hire!”, But when warm milk is felt, Baby started to melt, Naughty nanny immediately fired! The ice came out with a binky, And a diaper pretty stinky! Eskimo baby is she, Could it even be a he? It’s too frozen and all wrinkly! ALL WRITTEN BY LAURA LOO One by one they came out, midwife slapped 'em and into the cradle she packed 'em father blew candle out and exclaimed with a shout " Just like moths, it's the light that attracts 'em!" WRITTEN BY VIV WIGLEY Making babies was so much fun Now my boobies reach to my tum I can't even sneeze or cough It set's my weak bladder off ... I'd better stick to coke and rum WRITTEN BY SEREN ROBERTS AWARDED POEM OF THE WEEK ON 28TH AUGUST - THE HONOUR IS SHARED BY US ALL ... SPECIAL THANKS TO LIN LANE FOR STARTING THE COLLABORATION I'm feeling like a slot machine My wheels stopped on three tangerines Babies falling like rain It's no longer a strain That last one looks just like my spleen WRITTEN BY DANIEL TURNER I thought I was going to have two But now I don't even have a clue It feels like maybe four I can't take it no more I have five months to go til I'm due WRITTEN BY ALEXIS Y I was rushed to the hospital gate not yet due, but I just couldn't wait labor's water broke through elevator broke too flooded stairwells to room did create! WRITTEN BY SANDRA HAIGHT

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Caycay Jennings

Date: 9/5/2016 9:53:00 PM

I never saw these before. What a great laugh I have had. THANK you EVERYone ... CayCay

Jan Allison
Date: 9/6/2016 4:51:00 AM

You can still join in the fun CayCay I have 3 collabs that are still being added to:-)The most wonderful thing for me is that some people are trying the limerick form for the first time:-) hugs jan xx

Brian Davey

Date: 9/2/2016 9:32:00 PM

Great stuff congrats to you all this is a wonderful piece

Jan Allison
Date: 9/3/2016 12:35:00 AM

Still room for more people to add their lines Brian:-) hugs Jan xx

Gail Lewis

Date: 9/2/2016 6:55:00 PM

totally fab write

Jan Allison
Date: 9/3/2016 12:35:00 AM

Thanks Gail - always room for more to join in:-) hugs Jan xx

Sandra Haight

Date: 9/1/2016 10:38:00 AM

Such a fun and creative collaboration! Congratulations to you, Jan, and all your contributors for it being honored as Poem of the Week! Hugs, Sandra

Jan Allison
Date: 9/1/2016 11:36:00 AM

Thanks Sandra it is an honour to be shared by all - please feel free to write a limerick to the collaboration and I will add it to the poem:-) hugs Jan xx

Anne-Lise Andresen

Date: 8/31/2016 12:53:00 PM

- CONGRATULATIONS TO YOU ALL -

Jan Allison
Date: 8/31/2016 12:59:00 PM

Thanks Anne-Lise do join in and add a poem if you wish:-)In the last 2 months I think I've written at least 5 or 6 poems inspired by contests - its very flattering that soupers are turning some of them into collaborations:-) hugs Jan xx

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 8/29/2016 3:24:00 PM

oh my, I don't have time to study these yet. Will you be adding to them if I come up with one too? Big congrats for getting an honor for starting this, Jan.

Jan Allison
Date: 8/29/2016 3:33:00 PM

Yes Andrea please feel free to join in when you have time there is no rush I know you are busy - it will be POTW until next Sunday so I am hoping there will be a flood of poets wanting to add some lines lol - loolu was awesome and wrote 3 poems:-) lol:-)

Constance La France

Date: 8/29/2016 2:10:00 PM

Jan, a big CONGRATULATIONS to you and all the others who joined your challenge, very creative and entertaining limericks~

Jan Allison
Date: 8/29/2016 2:12:00 PM

Thanks Constance I am so delighted that my poem inspired others to write and have fun:-) hugs Jan xx

Marilyn Williams

Date: 8/29/2016 12:55:00 PM

I loved them all. Good luck to you all. Great Collaboration of the Week.

Jan Allison
Date: 8/29/2016 1:54:00 PM

Thank you so much Marilyn, being awarded POTW is an honour which is shared by those who have joined in the collaboration - if my poem inspires them to be creative that is the most important thing:-) hugs jan xx

Arthur Vaso

Date: 8/29/2016 12:21:00 PM

People are free to read the poets they like and ignore the ones they dont, by the obvious positive responses from the poets here, I say to Jan, keep up the good work! Maybe what we are witnessing is just sour grapes! LOL

Julia Ward
Date: 10/1/2016 6:26:00 AM

Hardly - my Deluge contest filled up very nicely.

Jan Allison
Date: 8/29/2016 1:52:00 PM

Thanks Arthur, I think you are probably correct. Rest assured I will never be deterred from writing - if a contest inspires me I will write, if people wish to collaborate as a result of a poem I have written that is fabulous. I am breaking no rules just being creative:-) hugs jan xx

Julia Ward

Date: 8/29/2016 10:52:00 AM

Jan - Being inspired for your own writes is okay, but as you have copied my themes for contests TWICE now in COLLABORATIVE writes, I would ask you to desist from collaborations as it is mocking what I am doing in contests. It takes the focus away from contests and on to the poem's originator - you - which is not in the spirit of Poetry Soup. Your collaborative writes shouldn't be set up to deflect from contests and vie with them for attention as if you, Jan, are more important than contests.

Lin Lane
Date: 8/29/2016 11:25:00 AM

Your memory of those obnoxious words is faulty. Actually, you should be thanking Jan for drawing attention to your contest and if you didn't have such an "I'm better than you" attitude, you may have more people wanting to join your contests. Too bad your 'discussion' with me is complete. You must want to reply to that.. go ahead.

Julia Ward
Date: 8/29/2016 11:12:00 AM

Lin Lane - Do not make up stories... Of course Jan can be inspired by my contests. What is unfair is her doing collaborative writes based on my contests for the reasons I explained above. That completes my discussion with you, Lin Lane.

Lin Lane
Date: 8/29/2016 11:07:00 AM

Julia, you accused me of doing the same thing months ago on your Fish Tale contest. Your remarks to me were so ugly that I had to block you to get rid of them. Stop your accusations. As Arthur pointed out, Jan writes poems based on others and not just you. You really need to stop thinking you're so important that people want to mock you.

Arthur Vaso

Date: 8/29/2016 10:32:00 AM

I might had you just did a poem, on me, it as hilarious and funny, having a sense of humor, I am honored by it.

Jan Allison
Date: 8/29/2016 10:37:00 AM

Yes I had fun being inspired by the cartoon I was sent by Mama Bear and you were a great sport letting me post it:-) hugs jan xx

Arthur Vaso

Date: 8/29/2016 10:30:00 AM

Dear Jan, I have seen you do poems based on other poets contests titles and themes as well, its great to be inspired here, however what you do is inspire others, make them laugh and smile, your kindness and interaction here, has helped all of us, so I must thank you dearly for it!

Lin Lane
Date: 8/29/2016 10:39:00 AM

Bravo, Arthur! There should be more joint efforts to instill humor and friendship on the site instead of looking for reasons to condemn.

Jan Allison
Date: 8/29/2016 10:35:00 AM

I have been inspired by other contests and written poems for them but not entered them in the contests. I have broken no rules by writing my flood warning poem and the ensuing collaboration has inspired other people to write.:-) hugs Jan xx

Lin Lane

Date: 8/29/2016 10:22:00 AM

Jan: Thank you for as Julia put it, "allow"ing my limerick to join yours in collaboration with many others who wished to share in having some harmless fun. Julia: You really need to look at what you wrote to Jan, telling her that TPS should know that she didn't answer your comment when you don't even give people the chance to comment on your writes. This collaboration makes no mention of you and poets are free to write about any topic that inspires us, and so we shall.

Lin Lane
Date: 8/29/2016 10:42:00 AM

You can pick on me any time in a write, Jan. I'm sure there are many cartoons that would inspire you to do so. I've written one quite a while back in which I made fun of myself.

Jan Allison
Date: 8/29/2016 10:29:00 AM

I have broken no rules Lin either by writing the poem which lead to the collaboration or by not replying to comment - the second one has now been amended ... and I will continue to maintain a dignified silence. My poem has inspired other people to be creative and that is what the site is about.:-) hugs Jan xx

Charmaine Chircop

Date: 8/29/2016 9:10:00 AM

Hhahaha..Very entertaining..Loved loved loved it...: )Well.done and Congrats ...Awesome pick tps.

Julia Ward
Date: 8/29/2016 10:12:00 AM

You didn't have to allow Lin Lane's collaboration! Doing a second collaboration around my contests themes gives people the notion you want to mock what I am setting up! I didn't mind joining in on the first time you did this, but it is now beyond a joke.

Jan Allison
Date: 8/29/2016 9:14:00 AM

Thanks Charma - Lin Lane started the collaboration and it escalated from there lol. I am delighted it got POTW hopefully there will be more poems added during the week I added Alexis's poem this morning:-) hugs jan xx

Gary Bateman

Date: 8/29/2016 7:28:00 AM

Jan, et al. Congratulation on the POTW honor. Very well-deserved!! Great Collaboration!! Cheers and Best, Gary

Jan Allison
Date: 8/29/2016 7:58:00 AM

Many thanks Gary:-) hugs Jan xx

Julia Ward

Date: 8/29/2016 7:21:00 AM

So why do you have your sights set on *my* contests for collabs? Interested to know.

Alexis Y.
Date: 8/29/2016 11:16:00 AM

Hi Jan, If you ever get inspired by something I wrote, you don't even to need ask. You inspire others to write and that humor of yours is contagious. Thanks for adding my poem. If you do another I'm in:-) Alexis

Arthur Vaso
Date: 8/29/2016 10:28:00 AM

I do not think one is required to answer comments, and most certainly not to one who always blocking others from commenting, thats kinda funny!

Lin Lane
Date: 8/29/2016 10:24:00 AM

Answering a comment is not a requirement on Poetry Soup.

Julia Ward
Date: 8/29/2016 10:19:00 AM

I note this was not answered.

Ralph Sergi

Date: 8/28/2016 5:24:00 PM

Congratulations, Ladies: At least two of my cars were christened the way to the hospital!

Jan Allison
Date: 8/28/2016 5:31:00 PM

Oh dear Ralph ... your comment made me smile ... but seriously we have no control when it comes to childbirth ... when the baby is ready the waters will flow. Thanks for dropping by to add your comment to the collaboration poem:-) hugs jan xx

Arthur Vaso

Date: 8/28/2016 4:46:00 PM

Hi there, just wanted to let you know, me and Nell congratulate you on getting POTW!!!! :)

Jan Allison
Date: 8/28/2016 4:53:00 PM

ha ha ha:-) Looking a the picture and thinking of your recent poem ... aren't you glad you're not an eskimo lol lol:-) hugs jan xx

Daniel Turner

Date: 8/28/2016 3:56:00 PM

Funny stuff, Jan, Congratulations on POTW. I think they are all funny.

Jan Allison
Date: 8/28/2016 3:59:00 PM

Thanks for taking the time to join in Daniel - I hope that with it being awarded POTW there will be more poems added during the week:-) hugs jan xx

Eve Roper

Date: 8/28/2016 2:15:00 PM

Congratulations on poem of the week :-) this is hilarious ! Hugs Eve

Jan Allison
Date: 8/28/2016 2:17:00 PM

Thanks so much to you and Sonny for joining in I am delighted to share the honour with everyone who contributed:-) hugs Jan xx

Lynn Marie

Date: 8/28/2016 1:29:00 PM

Congratulations on POTW! A wonderful honour with really fun input from so many talented poets :-) blessings to all, lynn

Jan Allison
Date: 8/28/2016 1:52:00 PM

Thanks Lynn it is so wonderful when other people join in and bring a few smiles to soup:-) hugs Jan xx

Alexis Y.

Date: 8/28/2016 12:58:00 PM

Lol! Jan, you started another funny limerick chain. I laughed at each one. How did I miss this?:-) Alexis

Jan Allison
Date: 8/29/2016 3:37:00 AM

I posted and Lin started the ball rolling and it turned into another collaboration - I am delighted people are happy to put their poems with mine - if we can make people smile that is the most important thing:-) Thanks for joining in Alexis I loved your poem:-) hugs Jan xx

Alexis Y.
Date: 8/28/2016 8:21:00 PM

You just posted it yesterday and it's already poem of the week? Way to go my friend. Congratulations to you and everyone that contributed to this hilarious write:-) Alexis

Jan Allison
Date: 8/28/2016 1:03:00 PM

It was only posted yesterday Alexis - do join in, I will continue to add poems to the collaboration:-) hugs Jan xx

Sunita U.D Palawon

Date: 8/28/2016 12:12:00 PM

Wonderful lines contributed...fun reading them! Congrats to all. :) Sunita

Jan Allison
Date: 8/28/2016 12:14:00 PM

Thanks Sunita:-) hugs Jan xx

Seren Roberts

Date: 8/28/2016 11:12:00 AM

They are so funny Jan....thank you for asking me to contribute.....Seren.

Jan Allison
Date: 8/28/2016 11:35:00 AM

You wrote such a great one last time Seren I knew this would be right up your street:-) hugs jan xx

Lu Loo

Date: 8/28/2016 10:34:00 AM

Congrats Jan! SO happy for you and thank you for allowing me to be part of this fun collab :) You are the best and sweetest lady ever...;)-luloo

Jan Allison
Date: 8/28/2016 11:34:00 AM

:-) hugs Jan xx

Lu Loo
Date: 8/28/2016 11:26:00 AM

YOU ROCK LADY! I am so grateful to have met such a kind silly and respectful woman. Thank you for everything and all your support :)-luloo

Jan Allison
Date: 8/28/2016 10:54:00 AM

I had to post all three of your poems LuLoo they were fabulous - without YOUR participation the collaboration would not have been as successful as it has been. It's an honour to be shared by us all:-) hugs Jan xx