Home » Poems » Silent One » Floating

Silent One | + Follow Poet |

Floating

Poet's Notes

(Show)

Become a Premium Member and post notes and photos about your poem like Silent One.

Entered into fading, floating,fluttering words poetry contest by Constance Le France

Image by Carl Spitzweg

The people of this world are like the three butterflies in front of a candle's flame. The first one went closer and said:I know about love. The second one touched the flame lightly with his wings and said: I know how love's fire can burn. The third one threw himself into the heart of the flame and was consumed. The alone knows what true love is. Rumi I sit alone in a silent field of fairness, under saffron rays kissing sunflower serenity, among dawn's daisies and dusk's dandelions - watching buds floating away with whisking winds. Fate does not favour my quest to soar freely. In a meadow of humanity's betraying breaths, our buttercup souls become ambushed by a suffocation of sighs. When there is no justice in spiteful judgement, visions of Basilisk slither with a deadly gaze. Envious eyes poisoned by potions of venom, abuse the selfless mistress of my garden's muse - but without Eve there would be no Adam nor Eden. Weeping on the grave of her past self, her fatigued spirit struggles to fight and rise. I watch darkness ascend in springtime, when her mind portrays a veil in the misery of mist. I feel like a helpless flame burning in ivory wax. Untreated wounds with time festering into an ebony existence of self deprecation. I can see butterfly hunters with their narcissistic nets, chasing my imperfectly perfect empress of empathy. Her heart hungers for a plethora of petals, to hover from a ruby rose to lotuses of liberty, but predatory birds like harlots and hussies, have lured her into a withering winter colony of thorns. Sorrow stitched her eyes closed with merlot thread, as her sanity sits upon the edge of heaven and hell. The Devil wears a hat with an emblem of her sins. The bewitching conspiracy of his crimson eyes, tempting to massacre the magnificence of her invisible crystal wings of bronze and gold. In a martyrdom of self-sacrifice, love reminds her that kindness glows softly like fireflies, as she tries to find light in a tunnel of lost thoughts. The universe echoes her cosmic whispers of life, as psychedelic ink shimmers like starlight in her veins, pouring compassion into a selfish blank canvas of hearts. Cherry blossoms tint the air pink and she's looking at the world through their gaze, but knows like everything, their fragile beauty is only momentary.

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem.

Please Login to post a comment

Susan Ashley

Date: 11/21/2023 8:04:00 AM

Dear Silent One, your breathtaking poem saturates my imagination with a tapestry of richly woven metaphors and imagery. Every verse a treasure trove of textures, emotions and alliterations for my soul to revel in, to happily drown in.. to become immersed in your deep and soulful verse is a poetic pleasure not to be missed! Warmest wishes my inspiring friend.. ~Susan

Constance La France

Date: 10/9/2023 2:32:00 PM

Silent, excellent writing and congratulations on your win in my contest, love the image and your Rumi quote, Constance

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 10/1/2023 9:22:00 PM

Another wowser, Silent One. Congrats in the contest

Valsa George

Date: 9/25/2023 10:44:00 PM

I too can only make a 'Wow' to condense all the ocean my emotions of wonderment in a spoon! Today I have been fortunate to read a handful of amazing poetry by extra gifted poets making me again ponder how inconsequential I am as a poet. But I console myself.... Each one is great in his own way. I am glad I get this chance to be called a poet. Eve is presented in awful dimensions of 'failed art', a symbol of deepening melancholy.....! "Sorrow stitched her eyes closed with merlot thread, as her sanity sits upon the edge of heaven and hell.." Love such lines, dear Silent one.

Silent One
Date: 9/26/2023 12:29:00 PM

Valsa please don't think like that. You are q very good poet. No inferior to anyone else. Thank you for your great feedback

Juliet Ligon

Date: 9/25/2023 7:05:00 PM

Wow, amazing detailed descriptions! I love your alliteration throughout.

Silent One
Date: 9/26/2023 12:49:00 PM

Thank you Juliet..

Anne-Lise Andresen

Date: 9/25/2023 9:39:00 AM

- Your linguistic tools raise your descriptions to maximum volume, S.O. ... a wonderful poem :) - hugs

Silent One
Date: 9/26/2023 12:49:00 PM

Thank you

Malabika Ray Choudhury

Date: 9/24/2023 6:35:00 AM

Outstanding poem, Dear SO. Thanks for coming back, and creating such marvels. Read your poems many times - and get inspired!

Silent One
Date: 9/26/2023 12:49:00 PM

Thank yoi

Maria Williams

Date: 9/24/2023 2:06:00 AM

Wow, you've come back bigger and better, S1. Don't really know how you get such inspiration or who your Muse is, but I'm inclined to think it could be Rumi himself. Incredible poem, out of this world. Hugs

Silent One
Date: 9/26/2023 12:50:00 PM

Rumi is a great inspiration..but this poem was written before that quote.. Thank you for your comment

Frankii Fame

Date: 9/24/2023 2:03:00 AM

wow! absolutely breathtaking! Silent One <3<3<3

Silent One
Date: 9/26/2023 12:51:00 PM

Thanks

Bill Baker

Date: 9/23/2023 10:23:00 PM

An eloquent poem, Silent One, the imagery was exquisite. Your use of colors enhanced the lovely descriptions, and the metaphors added depth and meaning to your poem. A FAV for my list and a great entry for the contest, my friend. Good luck in the contest, though this poem shouldn't need any luck. Have a great week! Bill p.s. thanks for reading and commenting on many of my poems recently.

Silent One
Date: 9/26/2023 12:51:00 PM

Thank you for your great feedback Bill..

Beryl Edmonds

Date: 9/23/2023 7:45:00 PM

Wonderful poetry Silent One, as always a deep intriguing read. Belle

Silent One
Date: 9/26/2023 12:52:00 PM

Thank you Belle

John Hamilton

Date: 9/23/2023 7:02:00 PM

Wow...no words SO two faves in 10 minutes a new record I think!

Silent One
Date: 9/26/2023 1:02:00 PM

Thats really kind. Thank you John

Sara Kendrick

Date: 9/23/2023 1:07:00 PM

Must be a contest going on this theme, if so, this one reads like a good contender to me. Way to go. I guess true love does plunge into love with all it has as Rumi said. Thanks for sharing this one with us and for dropping by my page. Sara

Silent One
Date: 9/26/2023 1:03:00 PM

Thank you

Regina Mcintosh

Date: 9/23/2023 8:04:00 AM

if excellence in poetry is your craft, then this work is more than enough to last through wars and famines, through the brokenness of death and the floods of feelings so gentle, so soft, so breathless, they feel like yesterday in the moment, with pieces of silence erasing the wind's song and beautiful shadows healing the last words from death's trembling brow - your poetry is truly a lesson in graceful, a hope that bleeds furious freedom, a moment when the heart is filled with completion. This is like a dream, "floating" along the verses of inspiration and tenderness. I love it so that I can't even think of the words to tell you - your words are like a smile, a promise, a wish - a blessing that I will always be grateful for. God bless you my friend. Love, Gina

Silent One
Date: 9/26/2023 1:03:00 PM

That's lovely feedback thank you

Lioness Onpaper

Date: 9/23/2023 8:00:00 AM

Wow brothaaaa … this imagery is just gorgeous! Saffron rays kissing sunflower serenity, among dawns daisies and dusk’s dandelions .. butterfly hunters with their narcissistic nets,ooo absolutely brilliant!!! Chasing my imperfectly perfect empress of empathy,awwwwn the lucky empress.. this is absolutely brilliant brothaa!!!

Silent One
Date: 9/26/2023 1:03:00 PM

Thank you

Sotto Poet

Date: 9/23/2023 7:25:00 AM

Dear Silent One, This new poem is undeniably captivating. With immense beauty and emotional depth, every aspect is commendable. The imagery is exquisite, painting vivid pictures in the mind and evoking a range of sensory experiences. The well-chosen words and adjectives leave a lasting impact, showcasing your impressive diction. Your ability to thread words coupled with your empathetic mind, transcends mere artistry. Your poem not only resonates deeply but also has the power to stir the soul.

Silent One
Date: 9/26/2023 1:04:00 PM

Thank you

Heidi Sands

Date: 9/23/2023 6:12:00 AM

Wow. That 1st stanza is perfect and drew me right in. So many striking lines. I love reading your poetry. I am happy you are here, my friend. Superb! :) I have decided to add this to my FAVE :)

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 7:34:00 AM

Thank you Heidi, always nice to see you and especially for the fave.

The Aura Rhymes

Date: 9/23/2023 6:00:00 AM

As always a masterpiece . Keep it up ??

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 7:29:00 AM

Thank you little super star...

Vijay Pandit

Date: 9/23/2023 5:53:00 AM

Sorrow stitched her eyes closed with crimson thread, as her sanity sits upon the edge of heaven and hell--In a martyrdom of self-sacrifice, love reminds her that kindness glows softly like fireflies--highly emotive write, my friend. Splendor of your vocabulary resonates throughout. I like your Rumi quote that inspires and teaches.

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 7:29:00 AM

Funnily enough i found the quote after the poem and then realised how it linked with the poem.. No wonder I am a follower of Rumi and his teachings.. Thank you Vijay

Tom Woody

Date: 9/23/2023 5:38:00 AM

This feels like a tribute to Inky. In any case you managed to create a poem that stirs the emotions. I especially liked the last stanza, a reminder that joy can be fleeting. Thankfully, so is pain. Life is a rollercoaster of ups and downs. I hope this empress finds a happiness that lasts

Ink Empress
Date: 9/23/2023 7:33:00 AM

Hahahah m dead these comments

Tom Woody
Date: 9/23/2023 7:31:00 AM

Ha! Apparently you wanted to make sure I didn't miss the message ;)

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 7:28:00 AM

Have no idea why it appears three times..

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 7:27:00 AM

It is a tribute to all empath and fragile hearts and those who want to protect their loved ones against the dangers of the world... Thank you for your visit.

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 7:27:00 AM

It is a tribute to all empath and fragile hearts and those who want to protect their loved ones against the dangers of the world... Thank you for your visit.

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 7:22:00 AM

It is a tribute to all empath and fragile hearts and those who want to protect their loved ones against the dangers of the world... Thank you for your visit.

Hiya Sharma

Date: 9/23/2023 5:31:00 AM

This is definitely one of my FAVs from you.. Wow! The depth that you've incorporated in every line and painted a story with your words in such an impeccable and eloquent way.. Ah, what can I say.This one truly captivated me.. With gorgeous alliterations, melancholic emotions yet weaving hope and love in every line.How you've described your beloved as an empathetic soul and how 'butterfly hunters' try to fim her shining spirit.That's really evocative..your use of colours & flowers, enchanting!!

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 7:19:00 AM

Thank you for your lovely feedback, I appreciate it.. seems like you are competing against ink in regards to commenting lol

Hiya Sharma
Date: 9/23/2023 5:33:00 AM

There are too many magnificent lines to quote here, but i should definitely say that this write is an absolute masterpiece, as your all other writes are so unique in their own way! A heartfelt write.. Wishing you all the best for the contest :)

Mike Gentile

Date: 9/23/2023 5:23:00 AM

Interpretations as they are and not always as intended, I sometimes hesitate to express them! However, with your luminous piece, I must> I feel the aloneness of lost love in the physical sense yet forever to be present. What a talent you have Silent One!!

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 7:19:00 AM

Yes you could interpret it like that.. thank you for your visit young man..

Ink Empress

Date: 9/23/2023 5:16:00 AM

Wow i am in awe of how you weave words and how your empathetic mind thinks and feel so much is beyond artistic! Butterfly hunters everywhere! Stealing the empathy of so many and you’ve written so well about that. I love that opening! And how you’ve used various flowers, as gardener you are arent you: i especially love how you’ve mentioned about spiteful judgemnt and envious eyes, and narcissists hunting for fragile minds to attack them as that’s what they know best. Kindness yes glows like-

Ink Empress
Date: 9/23/2023 7:32:00 AM

*rolls my eyes* lol i get excited when i read poems that i like. Makes me go gaga lol

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 7:18:00 AM

You feedback is always so OTT... but thank you and for faving it also.. Have to be careful of the butterfly hunters they will always prey on fragile hearts..

Ink Empress
Date: 9/23/2023 5:21:00 AM

Fireflies and the way you’ve used alliterations and descriptive diction to deliver this is beyond beautiful and left me in awe captivated! Theres a reason why u are my muse and u inspire me and so many, cus you breathe poetry. Who would have thought of lines such as “ the devil wears a hat with an emblem of sins” lol cute devil “ sorrow stitched her eyes wth crimson thread” whoa how vivid ! “ chasing my imperfectly perfect empress of empathy” awwn can i pretend that its abt me lol just kidding!! Loveee this poem so much! A fave for me and rumis quote there is so deep i should start reading rumi more! Wise poet he was ae. Goodluck for the contest! Youv nailed it

Unseeking Seeker

Date: 9/23/2023 4:40:00 AM

Gosh! What a masterful pen you wield, Silent One ~ a mesmerising write and a wise Rumi quote to go with it.

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 7:17:00 AM

Thanks for your feedback.. Rumi is my favourite poet..

Sara Etgen-Baker

Date: 9/23/2023 4:03:00 AM

What a beautifully touching poem. There's so much to like about your creation. It's exquisite with its imagery, the evocative sights and sounds. I liked so many lines, but the one that grabbed me the most was "butterfly hunters with narcissistic nets." My father taught me how to capture butterflies, especially Monarchs. But after he netted one, he whispered a wish and let the butterfly guy. I always teared up because he was such a sensitive man, intrigued with beauty as are you.

Silent One
Date: 9/23/2023 4:09:00 AM

This poem was originally called Butterfly Hunters...Thank you for your kind feedback and for sharing a beautiful moment with your dad