Notes About The Poem

Entered into fading, floating,fluttering words poetry contest by Constance Le France

Image by Carl Spitzweg

Floating

The people of this world are like the three butterflies in front of a candle's flame.
The first one went closer and said:I know about love.
The second one touched the flame lightly with his wings and said:
I know how love's fire can burn.
The third one threw himself into the heart of the flame and was consumed.
The alone knows what true love is.
Rumi


I sit alone in a silent field of fairness, under saffron rays kissing sunflower serenity, among dawn's daisies and dusk's dandelions - watching buds floating away with whisking winds. Fate does not favour my quest to soar freely. In a meadow of humanity's betraying breaths, our buttercup souls become ambushed by a suffocation of sighs. When there is no justice in spiteful judgement, visions of Basilisk slither with a deadly gaze. Envious eyes poisoned by potions of venom, abuse the selfless mistress of my garden's muse - but without Eve there would be no Adam nor Eden. Weeping on the grave of her past self, her fatigued spirit struggles to fight and rise. I watch darkness ascend in springtime, when her mind portrays a veil in the misery of mist. I feel like a helpless flame burning in ivory wax. Untreated wounds with time festering into an ebony existence of self deprecation. I can see butterfly hunters with their narcissistic nets, chasing my imperfectly perfect empress of empathy. Her heart hungers for a plethora of petals, to hover from a ruby rose to lotuses of liberty, but predatory birds like harlots and hussies, have lured her into a withering winter colony of thorns. Sorrow stitched her eyes closed with merlot thread, as her sanity sits upon the edge of heaven and hell. The Devil wears a hat with an emblem of her sins. The bewitching conspiracy of his crimson eyes, tempting to massacre the magnificence of her invisible crystal wings of bronze and gold. In a martyrdom of self-sacrifice, love reminds her that kindness glows softly like fireflies, as she tries to find light in a tunnel of lost thoughts. The universe echoes her cosmic whispers of life, as psychedelic ink shimmers like starlight in her veins, pouring compassion into a selfish blank canvas of hearts. Cherry blossoms tint the air pink and she's looking at the world through their gaze, but knows like everything, their fragile beauty is only momentary.
Copyright © | Year Posted 2023

Poem

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Ashley Avatar
November 21, 2023 at 8:04 AM
Dear Silent One, your breathtaking poem saturates my imagination with a tapestry of richly woven metaphors and imagery. Every verse a treasure trove of textures, emotions and alliterations for my soul to revel in, to happily drown in.. to become immersed in your deep and soulful verse is a poetic pleasure not to be missed! Warmest wishes my inspiring friend.. ~Susan
La France Avatar
October 9, 2023 at 2:32 PM
Silent, excellent writing and congratulations on your win in my contest, love the image and your Rumi quote, Constance
Dietrich Avatar
October 1, 2023 at 9:22 PM
Another wowser, Silent One. Congrats in the contest
George Avatar
September 25, 2023 at 10:44 PM
I too can only make a 'Wow' to condense all the ocean my emotions of wonderment in a spoon! Today I have been fortunate to read a handful of amazing poetry by extra gifted poets making me again ponder how inconsequential I am as a poet. But I console myself.... Each one is great in his own way. I am glad I get this chance to be called a poet. Eve is presented in awful dimensions of 'failed art', a symbol of deepening melancholy.....! "Sorrow stitched her eyes closed with merlot thread, as her sanity sits upon the edge of heaven and hell.." Love such lines, dear Silent one.
One Avatar
September 26, 2023 at 12:29 PM
Valsa please don't think like that. You are q very good poet. No inferior to anyone else. Thank you for your great feedback
Ligon Avatar
September 25, 2023 at 7:05 PM
Wow, amazing detailed descriptions! I love your alliteration throughout.
One Avatar
September 26, 2023 at 12:49 PM
Thank you Juliet..
Andresen Avatar
September 25, 2023 at 9:39 AM
- Your linguistic tools raise your descriptions to maximum volume, S.O. ... a wonderful poem :) - hugs
One Avatar
September 26, 2023 at 12:49 PM
Thank you
Ray Choudhury Avatar
September 24, 2023 at 6:35 AM
Outstanding poem, Dear SO. Thanks for coming back, and creating such marvels. Read your poems many times - and get inspired!
One Avatar
September 26, 2023 at 12:49 PM
Thank yoi
Williams Avatar
September 24, 2023 at 2:06 AM
Wow, you've come back bigger and better, S1. Don't really know how you get such inspiration or who your Muse is, but I'm inclined to think it could be Rumi himself. Incredible poem, out of this world. Hugs
One Avatar
September 26, 2023 at 12:50 PM
Rumi is a great inspiration..but this poem was written before that quote.. Thank you for your comment
Fame Avatar
September 24, 2023 at 2:03 AM
wow! absolutely breathtaking! Silent One <3<3<3
One Avatar
September 26, 2023 at 12:51 PM
Thanks
Baker Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 10:23 PM
An eloquent poem, Silent One, the imagery was exquisite. Your use of colors enhanced the lovely descriptions, and the metaphors added depth and meaning to your poem. A FAV for my list and a great entry for the contest, my friend. Good luck in the contest, though this poem shouldn't need any luck. Have a great week! Bill p.s. thanks for reading and commenting on many of my poems recently.
One Avatar
September 26, 2023 at 12:51 PM
Thank you for your great feedback Bill..
Edmonds  Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 7:45 PM
Wonderful poetry Silent One, as always a deep intriguing read. Belle
One Avatar
September 26, 2023 at 12:52 PM
Thank you Belle
Hamilton Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 7:02 PM
Wow...no words SO two faves in 10 minutes a new record I think!
One Avatar
September 26, 2023 at 1:02 PM
Thats really kind. Thank you John
Kendrick Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 1:07 PM
Must be a contest going on this theme, if so, this one reads like a good contender to me. Way to go. I guess true love does plunge into love with all it has as Rumi said. Thanks for sharing this one with us and for dropping by my page. Sara
One Avatar
September 26, 2023 at 1:03 PM
Thank you
Mcintosh Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 8:04 AM
if excellence in poetry is your craft, then this work is more than enough to last through wars and famines, through the brokenness of death and the floods of feelings so gentle, so soft, so breathless, they feel like yesterday in the moment, with pieces of silence erasing the wind's song and beautiful shadows healing the last words from death's trembling brow - your poetry is truly a lesson in graceful, a hope that bleeds furious freedom, a moment when the heart is filled with completion. This is like a dream, "floating" along the verses of inspiration and tenderness. I love it so that I can't even think of the words to tell you - your words are like a smile, a promise, a wish - a blessing that I will always be grateful for. God bless you my friend. Love, Gina
One Avatar
September 26, 2023 at 1:03 PM
That's lovely feedback thank you
Onpaper Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 8:00 AM
Wow brothaaaa … this imagery is just gorgeous! Saffron rays kissing sunflower serenity, among dawns daisies and dusk’s dandelions .. butterfly hunters with their narcissistic nets,ooo absolutely brilliant!!! Chasing my imperfectly perfect empress of empathy,awwwwn the lucky empress.. this is absolutely brilliant brothaa!!!
One Avatar
September 26, 2023 at 1:03 PM
Thank you
Poet Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 7:25 AM
Dear Silent One, This new poem is undeniably captivating. With immense beauty and emotional depth, every aspect is commendable. The imagery is exquisite, painting vivid pictures in the mind and evoking a range of sensory experiences. The well-chosen words and adjectives leave a lasting impact, showcasing your impressive diction. Your ability to thread words coupled with your empathetic mind, transcends mere artistry. Your poem not only resonates deeply but also has the power to stir the soul.
One Avatar
September 26, 2023 at 1:04 PM
Thank you
Sands Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 6:12 AM
Wow. That 1st stanza is perfect and drew me right in. So many striking lines. I love reading your poetry. I am happy you are here, my friend. Superb! :) I have decided to add this to my FAVE :)
One Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 7:34 AM
Thank you Heidi, always nice to see you and especially for the fave.
Rhymes Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 6:00 AM
As always a masterpiece . Keep it up ??
One Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 7:29 AM
Thank you little super star...
Pandit Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 5:53 AM
Sorrow stitched her eyes closed with crimson thread, as her sanity sits upon the edge of heaven and hell--In a martyrdom of self-sacrifice, love reminds her that kindness glows softly like fireflies--highly emotive write, my friend. Splendor of your vocabulary resonates throughout. I like your Rumi quote that inspires and teaches.
One Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 7:29 AM
Funnily enough i found the quote after the poem and then realised how it linked with the poem.. No wonder I am a follower of Rumi and his teachings.. Thank you Vijay
Sharma  Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 5:31 AM
This is definitely one of my FAVs from you.. Wow! The depth that you've incorporated in every line and painted a story with your words in such an impeccable and eloquent way.. Ah, what can I say.This one truly captivated me.. With gorgeous alliterations, melancholic emotions yet weaving hope and love in every line.How you've described your beloved as an empathetic soul and how 'butterfly hunters' try to fim her shining spirit.That's really evocative..your use of colours & flowers, enchanting!!
One Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 7:19 AM
Thank you for your lovely feedback, I appreciate it.. seems like you are competing against ink in regards to commenting lol
Sharma  Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 5:33 AM
There are too many magnificent lines to quote here, but i should definitely say that this write is an absolute masterpiece, as your all other writes are so unique in their own way! A heartfelt write.. Wishing you all the best for the contest :)
Gentile Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 5:23 AM
Interpretations as they are and not always as intended, I sometimes hesitate to express them! However, with your luminous piece, I must> I feel the aloneness of lost love in the physical sense yet forever to be present. What a talent you have Silent One!!
One Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 7:19 AM
Yes you could interpret it like that.. thank you for your visit young man..
Empress Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 5:16 AM
Wow i am in awe of how you weave words and how your empathetic mind thinks and feel so much is beyond artistic! Butterfly hunters everywhere! Stealing the empathy of so many and you’ve written so well about that. I love that opening! And how you’ve used various flowers, as gardener you are arent you: i especially love how you’ve mentioned about spiteful judgemnt and envious eyes, and narcissists hunting for fragile minds to attack them as that’s what they know best. Kindness yes glows like-
Empress Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 7:32 AM
*rolls my eyes* lol i get excited when i read poems that i like. Makes me go gaga lol
One Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 7:18 AM
You feedback is always so OTT... but thank you and for faving it also.. Have to be careful of the butterfly hunters they will always prey on fragile hearts..
Empress Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 5:21 AM
Fireflies and the way you’ve used alliterations and descriptive diction to deliver this is beyond beautiful and left me in awe captivated! Theres a reason why u are my muse and u inspire me and so many, cus you breathe poetry. Who would have thought of lines such as “ the devil wears a hat with an emblem of sins” lol cute devil “ sorrow stitched her eyes wth crimson thread” whoa how vivid ! “ chasing my imperfectly perfect empress of empathy” awwn can i pretend that its abt me lol just kidding!! Loveee this poem so much! A fave for me and rumis quote there is so deep i should start reading rumi more! Wise poet he was ae. Goodluck for the contest! Youv nailed it
Seeker Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 4:40 AM
Gosh! What a masterful pen you wield, Silent One ~ a mesmerising write and a wise Rumi quote to go with it.
One Avatar
September 23, 2023 at 7:17 AM
Thanks for your feedback.. Rumi is my favourite poet..
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