Fears

I made a list today of my fears It went like this: I am afraid of war of our people killing their people because they killed our people and their people killing our people because we killed their people and on and on until maybe there will be nobody left I am afraid of death What if I never see everybody who has died ever again? What if I was wrong and there is no heaven and I am just in the blackness of death forever? I am afraid of pain and suffering Which is often caused by the above things Because war hurts so many people and those people on both sides have families And when they die everybody is affected The killer has blood on their hands and remorse in their heart The victim is gone and nothing will bring them back The families are hurt because their relative is gone or their lifelong companion has killed somebody I am afraid of all these things and more But when I look back at them They seem too big of fears for a middle-schooler My friends fear tests and pre-algebra boys liking them grades I don't like these things, but I don't fear them. Am I supposed to fear them? As I reread my fears slowly this time I think they are a bit too global for me to be worried about But I am feeling stubborn today So I don't erase them.