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Don'T Stand So Close To Me

I know an old lady called Mel
By golly she doesn’t half smell
When she lifts up her arm
It is cause for alarm
I shout bye and then run like hell!

2nd February 2017

bodyhumoroussenseslimerick

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Cheryl Hoffman

February 5, 2017 at 6:57 PM

If I ever smell like Mel, please toss me some deodorant before running like hell! Funny stuff Jan, thanks for the chuckle!~ hugs Che :)

Jan Allison

February 5, 2017 at 7:11 PM

ha ha ha Cheryl:-) hugs Jan xx

Supraja Kannan

February 4, 2017 at 4:43 AM

Ha ha ha... You always make me laugh... Thank you so much for sharing Jan...A big big 7...

Jan Allison

February 4, 2017 at 7:11 AM

Thanks so much for reading!:-) hugs jan xx

Carolyn Devonshire

February 3, 2017 at 12:56 PM

Got to love your limerick, Hon. I'll keep running and not stop to see if old men smell like Mel. LOL Witty!

Jan Allison

February 3, 2017 at 6:20 PM

lol and Mel is a woman in the poem but of course it is a male name too:-) hugs Jan xx

Tim Smith

February 3, 2017 at 8:19 AM

Poor little Mel would rarely leave the house... Because of this she she had not taken a spouse...Jan tried to wash her clean...Fainted when she seen....There wasn't hair but a decaying mouse

Jan Allison

February 3, 2017 at 8:41 AM

ha ha ha:-) hugs Jan xx

Anne-Lise Andresen

February 3, 2017 at 3:59 AM

- Sad .... but, true .... - Nice people ... but the smell makes you want to puke :) - hugs // Anne-Lise :)

Jan Allison

February 3, 2017 at 8:41 AM

Loved your poem today lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Darren White

February 3, 2017 at 3:56 AM

I am so NOT going to read this one to my best friend MEL hahahaha! (Love that song by the way)

Jan Allison

February 3, 2017 at 8:42 AM

ha ha ha its a fiction write I don't know anyone called Mel just rhymed with smell - :-) hugs Jan xx

White Wolf

February 2, 2017 at 7:07 PM

You always do such great limericks, Jan! And funny too! Have a great day!

Jan Allison

February 3, 2017 at 8:43 AM

Thanks White Wolf:-) hugs Jan xx

John Lawless

February 2, 2017 at 6:59 PM

But Jan, it is all natural, organic, non animal tested, biodegradable, ... I'm surprised everyone isn't "wearing" it

Jan Allison

February 3, 2017 at 8:43 AM

true John!:-) hugs Jan xx

Charmaine Chircop

February 2, 2017 at 6:55 PM

I knew an old lady called Dee/Who lived by the blackberry tree/whenever so close/i held tight my nose/her dirty worn skirt smelled like pee.. :).True story-When I was about ten yrs old..Mom would make mr help this old lady with her groceries,because she was alone with an older sister and a son who was not mentally fit,So I had to help her..but Her mind was leaving her too..and truely this poor lady used to smell likr pee..Because She just did pee anywhere .Ur an inspiration for fun.A blessing.

Jan Allison

February 3, 2017 at 8:44 AM

eww Charma poor you this is a fiction poem I don't know a smelly melly lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Andrea Dietrich

February 2, 2017 at 6:31 PM

haha, that is good one, Jan. But it's strange one thing. When I say doesn't half smell, it is a more positive thing than negative. Is it taken differently by British?

Jan Allison

February 3, 2017 at 8:44 AM

It's a british thing I guess and I sent you a mail:-) hugs Jan xx