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Dear Ivy

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My behaviorally disordered ADHD and fetal alcoholic daughter, with abandonment issues and deep-seeded food anxiety issues, suddenly lost her long-standing school bus aide, probably to compassion burn-out.  Ivy can be a profound motivator of impatience in those around her, even with deep and widely developed caregiving and receiving skills. This is the farewell that I think Ivy would have found more therapeutic than the isolating complexities of disappearance without explanation or expressed gratitude for what did co-relationally work for so long.

To be clear, not saying goodbye was an administrative decision from above; not what Ivy's aide wanted for herself or for Ivy.

Dear Ivy, I am sorry we did not receive even just a moment to say goodbye and thank you to each other for all those school bus rides we took together, you in your harness, and me in my wonder about what's coming next from your talking head to mine. It is time for me to move on to another student, but I am happy to leave you in Miss Josie's care. I know she will enjoy your time invested in each other, Listening and taking turns speaking kindly with each other, Singing and maybe even a little dancing together, reading and drawing as light and bumps allow. Maybe you can teach each other some new KnockKnock jokes. KnockKnock. Who's there? Sandi. Sandy who? Sandy sandwiches are not good for you. KnockKnock. Who's there? Josie. Josie who? Jo see for yourself, Open the door! I am grateful to have so many silly and lovely memories of you to take with me. And, the greatest farewell gift you could give me is your reassurance that these same warm and happy memories of us are what you will carry with you on your great adventurous journey into well-being. Warmly yours, Sandi Sandi who? Sandy snacks are not so good for you.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2019




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Book: Reflection on the Important Things