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Circles In the Sky - Collaboration With Space Cadet

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Collaboration poem of Space Cadet and Darren White

Wesley C (Space Cadet) and I did a funny exercise together: he wrote a first line, sent it to me, I added a line, sent it to him. Rinse and repeat. After twenty lines we had a silly poem, with spies, paper with hidden messages and all, and then we stopped.

But the first five lines were so beautiful, I just HAD to do something with them. These lines are the first five lines of the poem below. I finished the poem, Wesley added and edited, we both revised some more, and this is the result.

I hope you all like it as much as we both do :)

Darren.

CIRCLES IN THE SKY Julie traces circles in the sky; Wills her finger to connect the lines So they don't disappear like summer, Where last sun rays simmer. I tug at her grass-stained dress; The hem frills in my fingers. I watch her write her lines With serious dedication. Her bare feet kiss my shins, Soft scratches of ticklish nails. A Ladybug begins its journey Across a bridge of hair. Julie pulls her dress over her knees; She shivers against The moist dew of growing evening looming shadows, Of nearby willow trees. I share my sandwich, lift my glass To her soft trembling lips: I build a house of arms and legs. She makes it home, gently puts the Ladybug on a nearby Daisy to explore, and I explore her. Julie traces circles ‘round my eyes, Wills her finger to connect the line. Of my frowned brow with intense focus, We fold the blanket around ourselves To brush the world aside. Enfolding us in a cocoon, Wrapped into a world of us, alone; while dewing diamonds glisten in our hair, as thousands of glow worms find their way back to warmth; we are lit from within, to shut out cold Autumn's ending.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2016




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Date: 12/18/2016 1:01:00 PM
A great excersise... You're right that beginning is amazing, the rest not shabby either.
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Darren White
Date: 12/18/2016 1:04:00 PM
Thanks Tim, I am proud of this poem, so yeah I agree with you. Soon there will be a reading attached to it too, stay tuned :)
Date: 12/18/2016 12:03:00 PM
This is such a sweet and loving poem!!! Loved it
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Darren White
Date: 12/18/2016 12:54:00 PM
It is, isn't it :) Thanks Claudia <3
Date: 12/18/2016 10:59:00 AM
I wouldn't call it a silly poem you do you and your friend a disservice, it is a very well written poem..well done
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Darren White
Date: 12/18/2016 11:10:00 AM
No. This is NOT a silly poem at all :) I explained how this poem, that I love very much, grew out of an exercise that ended silly. That's something different. Thank you for your comment. I am proud of this poem and wouldn't change a word in it.
Date: 12/18/2016 3:47:00 AM
That was other-than, I was transported and loved it. Divine writing ... CayCay
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Darren White
Date: 12/18/2016 6:41:00 AM
Thanks CayCay. It was funny how this poem wrote itself. That's what a few lines and a lot of inspiration suddenly can do...
Date: 12/18/2016 12:59:00 AM
This is truly great poetry! You guys work very well together! Such talent!
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Darren White
Date: 12/18/2016 1:08:00 AM
Thanks Rick, and yes, we certainly do. i love it, and it adds so much fun to what I am doing, plus I learn a lot.

Book: Reflection on the Important Things