Choosing Life
Eighty-four pounds at age 27
An illness nearly claimed my life
“You have an option,” the doctor said
But the choice was one that cut like a knife
“Pray for a miracle; linger in pain
Or negate any chance of having children”
My husband had died, my hope long since drained
In a sense I already felt barren
No way to rejoice, given such a choice
Knew I’d never feel like a real woman
So I sought guidance from my inner voice
Made the sign of the cross, said, “Amen”
“Do it,” I cried, tears welling in my eyes
My body dying, I saw no option
It seemed better than facing my demise
This was my darkest hour without question
Career struggles I faced in years ahead
And there was no man standing by my side
Empty within, faced the future with dread
Had I made the right choice? Still can’t decide
Perhaps a miracle would have occurred
I believe God watches over us all
But to a pain-free life I had deferred
Instead of trusting blessings would befall
* For Ryland's "Darkest Hour" challenge
Copyright © Carolyn Devonshire | Year Posted 2010
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