Caregiver Misery

Note: Sundowning – Most commonly in Alzheimer and Dementia patients, Sundowning, is changes in behavior that get worse in late afternoon, evening and can even last all night. Patients may be agitated, confused, unable to sleep; it may appear in other forms of disruptive behavior. Eight sleepless nights, pacing non-stop; legs, knee-bent, dragging toes are scraping carpet. Enduring a painful back; each breath drawn makes it throb and exhaustion’s in control. I can’t sleep until he sleeps; must stay awake in case he falls. I hold my breath to stand; it dulls the sharp stabbing pain in my back. I swallow another migraine pill and pray for him to fall asleep; he does not. Respite eludes me; caregiver to a dementia-mind, I collapse into a chair, dizzy and call myself an ambulance. I’m drained, hungry and he’ll Sundown several nights. I pass out and am brought around by an EMT; my patient's oblivious to the fact that anyone’s come into the house… he paces…and paces…