Caliginous Abyss

how do i find myself when i’m lost in you when my smile stemmed from your happiness when my tears flooded like rivers at the thought of not being what you wanted when my pleasure came from shivers and shakes of the earthquake that was you tell me how do i find myself when i’m stuck in the depths of your eyes how do i find myself when i’m covered by the smile i use to hide how do i find myself while i’m convinced i’m not enough when my love couldnt to make you stay when my hugs and kisses got pushed away when my sacrifices went unnoticed when i gave all of me to you and you broke it how do i find myself when i’m not dark enough how do i find myself when i’m not skinny enough how do i find myself when i’m not pretty enough how do i find myself when the person i love made me feel i wasn’t enough how do i find myself trapped in the abyss of the what if’s how do i find myself when i’m lost in the never ending darkness of my mind how do i find myself when i’m tired of looking who will find me if it isn’t me