Buried For Forty Years

memory haunted her for forty years feelings so real they held her down pinned to a darkness she was not aware of in the daylight therapist suggested she unpeel her layers suggested she let down her wall suggested and suggested and suggested she hated him more each week she was forty-eight when she decided to walk back in time to recall the feelings of that day, that hour, to remember the face of her abusers to forgive herself for not saving herself A stormy night One where no one can sleep comfortably She was half in and out of dream land when she began walking the steps to face that which she had buried when she was eight As she approached the memories began to fly They dissipated rapidly, no longer having a hold on her I am my own best therapist, she said She forgave herself and her child self smiled Realizing for the first time it was not their blame at all.