Blue Fire
I'm back on the pub stool
In the darkest corner
Flickering the flame of a lighter
Even though I don't smoke
Dressed in a polo
Blue and black
With black dress pants
I'm a studio lion
My home away from home
It's just a different place
Offering a different loneliness
Than what I know at home
And I look around
To all these happy faces
I could be a ghost
Never noticed
Maybe it's for the best
I'm a little inebriated
And I'm not good with people
Even when I'm sober
Alcohol makes me even more introverted
And even more introspective
Intrinsically interested in interloping
Insane incandescent informalities
Don't pity me
Don't even think of me
Not that you would
Not that they would
Loneliness is a disease
Infecting every part of life
And when married to anxiety
They procreate and birth depression
I wanted sympathy
At least I thought I did
But deep down
I wanted someone to care
I'm just a Debbie downer
Downing alcoholic beverages
To make me numb
Unfortunately I feel everything
But this is just a chapter
And if my novel ends before anything changes
What a waste it'll be
I'll be the best friend nobody had
I'm back on the pub stool
In the brightest corner
Roasting alive in blue fire
To the tune of apathy
Copyright © Christopher Goss | Year Posted 2018
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