Baking Chocolate

For shame I write again And indulge your memory Doting on you baselessly, As though you’re a man For shame, I have no remedy Because as a child, I could never know And as I am, you couldn't trust my word That I know you and I know hardship Because while there was always milk for me You are have always been baking chocolate And though I didn't know how unpleasant it would be I faithfully escorted that dry dust to my mouth Because you already owned me, and my passion was arcane I forfeited to you To become fortitude, your stronghold I gladly wed the night; I gladly wed your savagery Soliloquies decorating the shrine in my heart For you, my one good thing I have no capacity to abandon And I don’t know how to love conservatively And as easy as spitting you out could be I let you fester, I let you make a home in me But even now, I can still taste you in my mouth, Where years should’ve made you disappear And you’re nauseating You’re the bitter product of bitter chocolate I’m older now and my youth won’t erase you Nor passing moments, nor justified rage And my heart is empty plastic In my own hands And you marauded me I hate you more than there are words for My resilience has long melted away Yet you always have a hand on me And I can’t make you leave Eternal sunshine’s burning me My lips remember, my lips grieve For shame, I can’t forget you…