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Personal Note:

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Poem

For shame I write again
And indulge your memory 
Doting on you baselessly,
As though you’re a man
For shame, I have no remedy

Because as a child, I could never know
And as I am, you couldn't trust my word
That I know you and I know hardship
Because while there was always milk for me
You are have always been
 baking chocolate

And though I didn't know how unpleasant it would be
I faithfully escorted that dry dust to my mouth
Because you already owned me, 
and my passion was arcane
I forfeited to you
To become fortitude, your stronghold
I gladly wed the night; I gladly wed your savagery
Soliloquies decorating the shrine in my heart
For you, my one good thing 

I have no capacity to abandon
And I don’t know how to love conservatively 
And as easy as spitting you out could be
I let you fester, 
I let you make a home in me 

But even now, I can still taste you in my mouth, 
Where years should’ve made you disappear
 And you’re nauseating
You’re the bitter product of bitter chocolate
I’m older now
 and my youth won’t erase you
Nor passing moments, nor justified rage
 And my heart is empty plastic
In my own hands
And  you marauded me

I hate you more than there are words for
My resilience has long melted away
Yet you always have a hand on me
And I can’t make you leave

Eternal sunshine’s burning me
My lips remember, my lips grieve

For shame,  I can’t forget you…

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