Athazagoraphobia

Im petrified I'll fade away Worried about being forgotten Unseen as if i was in the shade Walk around empty, hands in my pocket I scream out for a friend But either they're deaf or I've lost my voice I constantly fear their love is pretend Wondering if they would leave given the choice I go to sleep at night lost Maybe my "life" is the real dream More of a nightmare where my negative beliefs are my boss Nightmare where there's no way to leave Terrified I'll die alone And thoughts of an empty house For you to remember me I'd carve my name into stone And let you stay however long in my house Theres a way I've coped with my fears I surround myself with people hoping a few may stick I let them confide in me their deepest fears Hoping their care isn't just a dirty trick Im less afraid around her She opens me up as if i was having surgery And of course she could leave, sure But I'd be at square one... a beast so ornery But my fears won't control me Not athazagoraphobia Not even my doubts though they are a vast sea She will be my drug...my last pound of opium