At Arm's Length
You keep me at arm’s length
Afraid to draw me closer
Afraid to let me go
You want me close enough to see
But not close enough to hold
Close enough to warm you
But not close enough to burn
You want some of the glow
Enough to bask in a tender light
You want to know I’m near
Near enough to touch!
And so I stay at arm’s length
For I’m so loathe to leave
I don’t want to lose sight of you
Or I might start to bleed
Tempted to be a base stealer
I move when you’re not aware
Sometimes I come much closer
Other times I slink farther away
Then I judge your expression
To see if you’ve noticed the change
Is that worry or a smile
That I see reflected in your eyes?
But here comes a warning
Straight from my heart of hearts:
At some point I’ll get tired
Of this little charade
Of standing still like a lifeless statuette
I’m not one who can survive
Without being touched
So, though this is your comfort zone
It definitely doesn’t describe me
I’m a hands on kind of gal
Steeped in dreams of ecstasy
I love to experience
Emotions that are raw
No cover ups and pretenses for me
I see past that all
I love to set off
A firework display of love
The kaleidoscope of bursting colors
That no one can tire of
I know what I’m worth
I’m aware of my powers to please
Possession’s the game I play
And I always play to win!
Lukewarm doesn’t cut it
You’re either hot or cold
So, for now I’m docile and submissive
Playing your little game
But you better know who I am…
And know my other name:
“Woman of the Intense”
So, sweety, keep me at arm’s length
Occasionally look my away
But let me tell you this…
One day when you look back to see
That standing passion pillar of fire
You’ll see the scorch marks on the ground
Of where I used to stand
Burning to be
Closer to you
Than your arm’s length demands.
Wherever I'll be...
At that exact moment of truth
While blazing away in someone else’s arms
Keeping someone else warm
Know this:
I’ll smile a knowing yet sad smile
For I’ll see you in my mind’s eye
Reaching with both your arms outstretched
To pull in emptiness to your chest
Instead of that sweet desirable girl
Who could have set your world on fire…
That girl…
That you steadfastly, stubbornly kept
At arm’s length.
Eileen Manassian Ghali
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