At Arm's Length

You keep me at arm’s length Afraid to draw me closer Afraid to let me go You want me close enough to see But not close enough to hold Close enough to warm you But not close enough to burn You want some of the glow Enough to bask in a tender light You want to know I’m near Near enough to touch! And so I stay at arm’s length For I’m so loathe to leave I don’t want to lose sight of you Or I might start to bleed Tempted to be a base stealer I move when you’re not aware Sometimes I come much closer Other times I slink farther away Then I judge your expression To see if you’ve noticed the change Is that worry or a smile That I see reflected in your eyes? But here comes a warning Straight from my heart of hearts: At some point I’ll get tired Of this little charade Of standing still like a lifeless statuette I’m not one who can survive Without being touched So, though this is your comfort zone It definitely doesn’t describe me I’m a hands on kind of gal Steeped in dreams of ecstasy I love to experience Emotions that are raw No cover ups and pretenses for me I see past that all I love to set off A firework display of love The kaleidoscope of bursting colors That no one can tire of I know what I’m worth I’m aware of my powers to please Possession’s the game I play And I always play to win! Lukewarm doesn’t cut it You’re either hot or cold So, for now I’m docile and submissive Playing your little game But you better know who I am… And know my other name: “Woman of the Intense” So, sweety, keep me at arm’s length Occasionally look my away But let me tell you this… One day when you look back to see That standing passion pillar of fire You’ll see the scorch marks on the ground Of where I used to stand Burning to be Closer to you Than your arm’s length demands. Wherever I'll be... At that exact moment of truth While blazing away in someone else’s arms Keeping someone else warm Know this: I’ll smile a knowing yet sad smile For I’ll see you in my mind’s eye Reaching with both your arms outstretched To pull in emptiness to your chest Instead of that sweet desirable girl Who could have set your world on fire… That girl… That you steadfastly, stubbornly kept At arm’s length. Eileen Manassian Ghali