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As Clouds Break Forth In Whispered Breath

As clouds break forth in whispered breath blood colors creep amid the trees cold aftermath of icy death this crinkling touch, this crushing seize Blood colors creep amid the trees in stain of plenty left to spoil this crinkling touch, this crushing seize this wretchedness of clouds and foil In stain of plenty left to spoil cold aftermath of icy death this wretchedness of clouds and foil as clouds break forth in whispered breath ©10/1/2019 Poet’s October Pantoum Cash Prize Poetry Contest William Kekaula

Copyright © | Year Posted 2019




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Date: 10/7/2019 9:23:00 AM
I'm not insightful enough to understand your intentions in every line, John, but there was so much I loved about this poem. The blood orange imagery is excellent and the poem flows along beautifully. (PS - seize?)
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John Lawless
Date: 10/7/2019 6:18:00 PM
ei-ei-OH no!! Nice pick up Wendy. The eye does not always read what it reads...
Date: 10/6/2019 7:28:00 PM
G'day John … very well constructed indeed. Very much enjoyed - thank you John - Lindsay
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John Lawless
Date: 10/7/2019 6:58:00 AM
Thanks Laurie, after 35 years as an Ironwork the term "well constructed" is the ultimate compliment.....
Date: 10/2/2019 6:33:00 PM
An amazingly well penned poem...pantoum is not easy and this I couldn't wait to read the next line...
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John Lawless
Date: 10/7/2019 6:57:00 AM
Thanks Jeanne, always nice to hear from you....and yes...the Pantoum is not an easy form to corral. Glad you liked it.
Date: 10/2/2019 3:18:00 PM
Wow John this was simply brilliant! I love how you wrote it!;) how's the grandson? Is the squirrel what's was his name...? Lol ok a little play on your contest but I don't remember what your and your grandson named him!;)
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John Lawless
Date: 10/7/2019 6:55:00 AM
Hey Brenda, we named the squirrel "Scoot" and thanks for your kind words regarding the Pantoum.

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