I am an amphibian
Living in and out of my own truth
With you one day,
Totally against you the next.
Personalities swirling inside
Staring into a mirror wondering
Will we like me today?
Will we be kind to this face?
Will we have positive self-talk?
Will we be able to salvage any kind of love for self?
You look old, I think. Not a good start.
Is that a skin tag?
Worse start now.
What about trying to like ourselves today?
One of my personalities begins to whine.
I hate whiners.
Are we even going to try? Another personality inquires.
I turn away from the mirror, but not before thinking I look old.
My hands are old too.
Spotted. Freckled more than my face ever was.
A face I used to like.
Come on! One of my selves pleads.
Let's be our prancy, dancy self today.
Shall I call in sick? To play in my art studio?
To write my poetry? To salvage my joyful side?
I look back into the mirror. I look younger. I see my twelve.
I am excited now. The possibility of having a mental health day.
My muse is twirling and swirling, dancing.
Amphibian me laughs, as we reach for the phone.
I love it when my bliss comes out to play.
Copyright © Caren Krutsinger | Year Posted 2019