Alchoholic
Lost inside my head
As selfish as can be
Three kids to raise
And a husband, not seen
The attention they deserve
Takes second to the drink
A drunken mom again tonight
Is that what they think
Are they embarrassed
By the smell from my breath
Do they hide me from their friends
Do they wish me death
In their younger days
Just put them to bed
Now they are older
Seeing me I dread
What kind of example
Am I setting for these three
I never thought in a million years
That's the mommy I wld be
I try to justify it
The day's they drive me crazy
Honestly it's an excuse
For me being lazy
Instead of dealing with
the normality Of everyday
I hide behind a bottle
Just to get away
What am I trying a to run from
I love my little life
I love being a mom
And I'm happy being a wife
Something deep inside
Is missing from my soul
And I cannot figure out
How to make my heart feel whole
My sweet innocent little ones
Who have shown me how to love
With an unconditional surrender
By just looking up above
Their eyes sparkle So full of wonder
Hearts innocent and pure
And then there's me, the mom they love
Or at least they did before
Before I let the poison bubbly
Become part of me
I must b stronger from now on
And be the mom they need
Need and deserve
They didn't ask for this
I want to be their mommy
Don't run from my kiss
How? Is the question
Do I get back to who I was
Before I opened that first drink
Just to get a buzz
I'm running in a circle
How do I break free
It feels like alcohol
Is a part of me
Lost inside my head
As selfish as can be
Three kids to raise
Not to be like me.
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