Get Your Premium Membership

A Storm In My Brain

I grope in the dark recess of my soul. Where could I be? Am I in some sort of terrifying coma? Gasping, I smell a disinfectant, found only in hospitals. All around is darkness. And silence broken only by something ticking, a sort of rhythmic measure that never stops. It hurts. I feel the pounding of a headache. No one seems around. What's happening here? Can someone explain this mysterious silence? I scream but no one hears. Not even I can hear. But I can feel. I must be awaking. Listen to the ticking machine. It seems to echo my heart. Eons after eons pass. Then I hear soft footsteps. But my eyes won't open. Then I remember. My eyes are bandaged. An intervention urgently performed. The pain increases. Madness. A jab, and I am smothered into further darkness. Silently I scream. But no one, not even I hear.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2021




Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem.

Please Login to post a comment

Date: 9/13/2021 9:47:00 AM
Oh my goodness. Sounds like someone in a coma. Scary stuff. Hope it isn't a real experience. God Bless my friend, JB
Login to Reply
Date: 9/12/2021 3:25:00 AM
That sounds really painful, Victor, hope you are doing well...you have captured the ache absolutely well:)
Login to Reply
Date: 9/11/2021 4:18:00 PM
Painful imagery, very sad; it is indeed a dark place. Nicely penned work and blessings to you.
Login to Reply
Date: 9/11/2021 2:29:00 AM
Dark, stark fear
Login to Reply
Date: 9/10/2021 8:48:00 PM
I imagine that being gravely ill can take a person's mind to confused and scary places. This is so well written, Victor. Blessings and hugs.
Login to Reply
Date: 9/10/2021 8:29:00 PM
Victor this free verse took me straight back to the year 1960, I went into hospital very ill (age 12) and knew nothing for a fortnight but my wild imaginings, they felt so real. Be this a true story or not you told it well. Hugs, Belle
Login to Reply
Date: 9/10/2021 1:19:00 PM
- Feels like a dark nightmare, Victor ... vivid and great described - Wishing you a lovely weekend ... take care, my friend :) - hugs // Anne-Lise :)
Login to Reply
Date: 9/10/2021 12:38:00 PM
Nice, Victor. This is a very suspenseful poem.
Login to Reply
Date: 9/10/2021 9:17:00 AM
your poem is so gripping victor, very well penned:-) hugs Jan xx
Login to Reply
Date: 9/10/2021 6:13:00 AM
Powerful and totally gripping from beginning to end…Delice
Login to Reply
Date: 9/10/2021 6:11:00 AM
Many suffer this trauma you so eloquently gave voice to. I hear the pain, the confusion, and helplessness. So well written, Victor.
Login to Reply
Date: 9/10/2021 6:08:00 AM
WoW! Victor, Your well written poem seems so real. That would not be a very good situation for nobody to be in. You describe the panic and terror very well. Good job. I hope you are well my friend.Have a great day and weekend-Alexis
Login to Reply
Date: 9/10/2021 5:00:00 AM
My sincerest hopes are that you're doing well, and I believe you've had to go through some kind of pain or surgery, but you must be a strong person to have overcome this situation; I've recently experienced this, and the one thing I remember after I woke up from anesthesia was complete and utter confusion. I hope this is just a fictional story. And if it’s you did great and make it look real. Blessings
Login to Reply
Date: 9/10/2021 3:40:00 AM
I can feel the fear and uncertainty of this person whether fictional or non-fictional is the question. I hope it is not an actual experience of yours. When my husband had his last spinal surgery he was seeing bright pastel colored race cars out in the parking lot and other things but nothing scary just confusing. I looked out the window to see if there might be something out there that he was seeing but from his bed he could not even see the parking lot. SK
Login to Reply
Kendrick Avatar
Sara Kendrick
Date: 9/10/2021 3:41:00 AM
I also wanted to say thank you for stopping by. Sara
Date: 9/10/2021 12:37:00 AM
I can imagine this being someone in a coma in a hospital Victor, I hope its a fictional write, you've discribed it so well. Tom
Login to Reply

Book: Reflection on the Important Things