Sara Kendrick Poet Free verse

Notes About The Poem

My mother died when I was fifteen months old plus about  two weeks more..I was told different things about her death..One person told me that she had been sick and took the wrong medicine, one person told me she committed suicide, and one person told me that she took the wrong medicine because she couldn't read..My adoptive parents never told me what they knew..I tried to get a death certificate once after my adoptive parents were so old that they were in the nursing home and I could not get one.I went on ancestry.com and through them I got the certificate at a high cost monetarily..The reason that I could not get a certificate before was that I did not know her full name...I have had to deal with this at my age now because I did not know for sure before and I felt that I really needed to know..I have worked through it but I still have those feelings of insecurity which comes with the territory of my particular circumstances..

A Loss

No one speak of her again
Unless in tones hushed, "Later we will talk"
"Shhh! Don't let the child know how her mother died."
She's too young to understand

Is self-destruction inherited?
Does it float around the genes?
Is security destroyed
               when one fine day
The lady disappears?
      Gone~never caress again
With loving arms wrapped around
             her child fifteen-months old.

The plateau has been reached 
          Opened faced look into the mirror
Her death certificate states
               Death by suicide
Ingestion of mercury cyanide

A child now weeps, grieves for the mother
    Looks into the mirror and sees
Cotton hair, wrinkles deeply creased
          Aware of how life's insecurities dwelt
Buried with the words~ no one speak of her again

Baby cries momma, momma time after time
        She does not come 
No matter how hungry, tired, cold, wet
         On the outside nor how much pain 
Cutting deep within until trust, security is destroyed 

Inspired by Cyndi MacMillan's contest "Own It"
Written: April 21, 2016

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Howard Kerr June 13, 2026 at 12:18 AM A moving testament to heartfelt emotion on foot of uncertainty and eventual closure. I sense your loss in every grieving word, Sara. A work of character and courage. Howard Sara Kendrick June 13, 2026 at 4:22 AM Howard, life issues out some hard scenes sometimes for people to adjust to. I am sure that it was just as hard for my four brothers who were ages 21, 18, 13, and 6 years old. Her death ruined their lives as well. Thank you for stopping by and leaving such a kind review. Sara K.

Wanda Y. Olivera August 15, 2016 at 11:11 AM deeply moved by your words..i can relate... Sara Kendrick August 16, 2016 at 7:22 AM Wanda, Thanks for the visit to my page..I am glad that someone felt what I needed to put on the page..Sara

Funom Makama May 5, 2016 at 1:07 PM This is is fine piece with soul-reaching quality. I love this so much Sara Kendrick May 5, 2016 at 5:01 PM Thank you for reading and taking time to give a kind review.I appreciate your continued support of my work..Sara

Andrea Dietrich April 26, 2016 at 5:42 PM wow, a VERY Strong piece, Sara. Very emotive and showing the pain of such an experience. Well done. Sara Kendrick April 26, 2016 at 5:51 PM Thanks for the visit to my page..I appreciate that you felt the pain with me..It was hard to write but every time I do something like write about it helps with the healing process..Sara

Anand Parmale April 23, 2016 at 9:10 AM You faced a lot at very little age.,Sara...I don't know what to say now....Things like these afflict you all through your life....Only thing we all can do is try and help people afflicted by the similar trauma....Life is tough sometimes and for some people....I don't know you personally....However your problems have made you kinder and stronger....We can't erase memories completely...But hope they won't haunt you in future....I know you will deal with them stronger you being such strong lady.

Kochieng Kevine April 22, 2016 at 9:26 AM what a sad poem! am sure God will grant you the comfort eternally. Sara Kendrick April 22, 2016 at 2:32 PM Thanks for the visit to my page..God has sustained me when I was unable to do anything for myself..Sara

Walter T. Ashe April 21, 2016 at 9:00 PM Sara, I read this and it was raining in my heart! God has kept you cupped in HIS hands and for you to share this, HE holds you even closer! Bless you Sara! Sara Kendrick April 22, 2016 at 2:31 PM Thanks for the visit to my page..Yes, God has cared for me at times even when I did not know that he cared..Many times I have been saved by my Guardian Angel when I did not even know that I had one..Sara

Harry Horsman April 21, 2016 at 5:38 PM What a sad poem, and a true one as well...she would be so proud i'm sure of the daughter left behind..... Sara Kendrick April 22, 2016 at 6:22 AM Harry, Thanks for stopping by..Yes, truth about life can be very sad sometimes but we were never promised a rose garden..What I experienced in life is nothing compared to what many others experienced..My older siblings probably knew about her sadness before the suicide more than I did..I don't remember any of it just remember what was told to me from time to time..I did carry with me the fact that suicide was a possible way out of life which is not good for anyone to carry around..Sara

Jan Allison April 21, 2016 at 5:29 PM A heartbreaking situation Sara - so much tragedy in your life from such a tender age and now you are able to find the real truth regarding your mother's passing. I hope you have some sort of closure now:-) hugs Jan xx Sara Kendrick April 21, 2016 at 5:36 PM Yes, I do have closure..I think that she lived in hell on earth which is sad..I wished that they could have gotten help for her but back then it probably would have been removal from the home to an institution so that would not have been any better..Sara

Lin Lane April 21, 2016 at 5:27 PM You DID need to know, Sara, and I'm glad you finally got the truth about the cause of your mother's death. But dear one, you are not to blame for what she did, and although I'm sorry for the years of your insecurity, you now have a measure of closure. Besides, from what I know of you, you turned out to be quite a kind and loving lady. Sara Kendrick April 21, 2016 at 5:34 PM Thanks for dropping by with encouraging words..Yes, I know that I am not to blame..I was too young to feel blame but insecurities and being able to trust were what became damaged from her death, being removed from the home and placed with strangers..It is a deep, deep in the subconscious and effects all my life..I have over the years worked through much of it but some still lingers..Sara