A GOOD SENSE OF HUMOR BLUNTS THE SHARP BLADES OF REALITY

"Humor can alter any situation and help us cope at the very instant we are laughing." –Allen Klein A GOOD SENSE OF HUMOR BLUNTS THE SHARP BLADES OF REALITY ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I lay on the table, a modern-day sacrificial lamb, pillow cradling my head, a fortress of foam and fabric. Then came Velcro, the sticky embrace of a high-tech straitjacket, my legs and wrists secured like a reluctant burrito. Into the tube I slid, a terrified astronaut on a mission, the ceiling loomed, a metallic sky, almost kissing my nose. I clenched my hands until they turned white pondering “Is this what it feels like to be a sardine in a can? The sounds began, a symphony of whirs and clicks, the MRI’s own version of a pop concert— I imagined it had a fan club, “Team Tube,” with its own T-shirts while I lay there, a star in a very narrow universe. I tried counting, “one, two, three.” But sigh… my thoughts were spinning like socks in a dryer. I imagined bystanders strolling by, pointing and staring. “Behold! Look at the sweating patient in the tube!” The minutes crawled, like a snail on a treadmill. “Perhaps I should have brought snacks or at least a good book.” But alas, I was tethered, a captive audience to my own claustrophobic anxiety. So I lay still, the sounds swirling, I chuckled softly, because if this is life, then I might as well enjoy the ride, even if it’s a little cramped and a little weird. After all, who needs a spa day when you can have an MRI, a slow, relaxing rollercoaster ride into the belly of the beast. Oh, the absurdity of my situation, and the irony of it all— Here I was, a human pretzel, searching for sanity inside the MRI. Then, suddenly, the whirring ceased, the ceiling pulled back. I emerged, a superhero in a hospital gown, Velcro stripped away, ready to conquer the world with a newfound appreciation for open spaces. Poem written for “A Good Sense Of Humor Blunts The Sharp Blades Of Reality Poetry Contest,” Natasha L. Scragg, sponsor, July 29, 2025.