Notes About The Poem

This was written in standard sonnet form then pulled apart a bit to it's current structure.  I labeled it as a sonnet here because I had to choose something and that felt closest.  

21st Century Cave Paintings

Far away, further gone, the farmer thought,
As watercolors brushed his canvas stain,

   “My wife and her children, must have forgot
     to come home again,” - blurs melting in rain;
                                        -
“Forever finds all, but did he forget,
the wet daVinci now who finger paints?”
I thought, then yelled; “Hey Dad!  Let’s go!  You’re wet!”;

        A son straining through blinds I felt inside,
        Would I once be he, or would I just die?
        His caves are graves that open, close, then hide,
        then back to close as bats chasing a fly;

    I thought of him, but thought to forget –

Then someone yelled from some neighbor’s cave,
     Some voice I knew, from some buried grave; 

               “Hey Dad!  Let’s go!  You’re wet!”

                         Far away.           Further gone.            In another’s thoughts.
Copyright © | Year Posted 2016

Poem

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Watson Avatar
November 13, 2017 at 9:59 AM
I was happ'ly transported! :)
Rycroft Avatar
August 7, 2016 at 12:56 PM
Well done congrats xxxxxx
Scars Avatar
August 7, 2016 at 11:55 AM
Phillip, congrats on your placement with this awesome poem :)-luloo
Haight Avatar
August 7, 2016 at 10:26 AM
Deep, sad and profound, Phillip. Congratulations on your placement in the 'caves' Premiere Contest! Sandra
Get a Premium Membership
Turn off ads, get more exposure for your poetry, and get more features with a Premium Membership.
Book: Diverse Voices: The Poetry of Human Rights and the Pursuit of Peace