A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.
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Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
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Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.
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Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.
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We dont like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out. Well, art is art, isnt it? Still, on the other hand, water is water! And east is east and west is west and if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does. Now, uh... Now you tell me what you know.
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Outside a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
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Why don't you bore a hole in yourself and let the sap run out?
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No one is completely unhappy at the failure of his best friend.
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Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.
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Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it is too dark to read
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Don't point that beard at me, it might go off.
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I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
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I did toy with the idea of doing a cook-book. The recipes were to be the routine ones: how to make dry toast, instant coffee, hearts of lettuce and brownies. But as an added attraction, at no extra charge, my idea was to put a fried egg on the cover. I think a lot of people who hate literature but love fried eggs would buy it if the price was right.
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You have the brain of a five-year-old child, and they must have been pleased to get rid of it.
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All people are born alike - except Republicans and Democrats.
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I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it.
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A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.
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I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception.
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From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.
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From the moment I picked up your book until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.
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I'm not crazy about reality, but it's still the only place to get a decent meal.
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I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.
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She got her good looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.
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I sent the club a wire stating, PLEASE ACCEPT MY RESIGNATION. I DON'T WANT TO BELONG TO ANY CLUB THAT WILL ACCEPT ME AS A MEMBER.
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Anyone can get old, all you have to do is live long enough
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Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife
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From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it
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An amateur thinks it's really funny if you dress a man up as an old lady, put him in a wheelchair, and give the wheelchair a push that sends it spinning down a slope towards a stone wall. For a pro, it's got to be a real old lady.
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Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.
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Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped.
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